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i.COVER & TITLE
I like the picture on your title a bit, and I do like the fonts as well, but together they don't exactly make a 'professional' vibe. This could just be my opinion since I can't exactly put my finger on the problem here, but perhaps it's worth asking for a second opinion. As of now, I don't think it holds that 'spark' that a cover should.
Your title is awesome. Cool, unique word with a word we know already. Makes for a title that makes sense, but also has some mystery to it.
ii. BLURB
Blurbs are the first thing a reader reads about your story, and therefore they make-or-break decisions as to whether they chose to continue on. To capture their attention and keep in, you need a hook. "For twenty-nine years" is not a good hook. We don't care how long it is. We want some serious insight into the story, right off the bat.
The biggest problem with your blurb is the fact that there just isn't enough information. He's a star, but how is that possible? What world are we dealing with here? He's journeying to self-discovery, but nobody really knows what that means. Your blurb is all fine and cool, but there's no actual information in it, which makes me reluctant to read on. I want to know exactly what Wilder is looking for. If he just sets off in a general direction hoping for self-discovery, your book wouldn't be very good. I'm assuming there's some sort of reason for him setting off, but as of now, I have no clue what it is. Frankly, you just need to tell me more in your blurb, starting with some essential questions: Where are they going, and why are they going there?
0 9 / 1 5
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i. PUNCTUATION
You have a tendency to miss commas rather than include too many—which to me is always a good thing since it's easier to fix. However, you should attempt to go through your story and place in commas for ease of reading. You're not horrible with commas by any stretch, but I did find quite a few places where the sentence came out too fast and slightly confusing because a comma wasn't where it was supposed to be. The simple way to catch these is to separate thoughts by a comma. Take this for example:
