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I stride across the hallway with my thoughts running wild

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I stride across the hallway with my thoughts running wild. My jaw is clenched and my fists are balled on my sides because of how hard I'm trying to control myself.

Fuck.

What the fuck did I just do?

I almost kissed her. Kissed her.

I know that I can't even go back to my room. My legs bring me closer to the gym, the only place where I can let out my anger and frustration.

What the hell was I thinking about?

I know that if I kissed her, I wouldn't be able to stop this growing feeling inside me. These feelings, which I can only feel for her ever since I felt numb.

Our kiss would only be poison for me, and I don't think that there will be any cure for it. It will only lead me to destruction.

I would get lost, and I can't get lost again. Even though being lost in her warmth sounds so fucking good to me, I can't. I can't be the same person anymore.

The fear is eating me out alive, and I feel like destroying everything around me. I storm into the gym and wear my boxing gloves.

Fuck with wanting to heal. Maybe I've never wanted to heal, and that's why I never visited Bennett's office again.

I approach the hanging heavy bag with long strides, face it, and take a deep breath.

I was out of control, but she made me go crazy.

When she asked me to help her zip the backside of her dress, I felt like tearing it apart. I didn't want her to choose the red lipgloss because I didn't want other men to try to kiss those sexy lips.

I land a straight punch at the heavy bag, panting.

I want to kiss her.

I want to feel her.

I want to get lost in her.

I fucking want to have her in my arms.

Punch.

My eyes squeeze shut, and the image of Nevaeh closing her eyes willingly and waiting for me to kiss her flashes in my mind.

No. Stop this.

Why did she do that? It would be better if she pushed me away.

Punch.

I'm completely losing my mind. My chest heaves up and down rapidly, and my body is shaking all over. I'm fucking terrified.

I land another punch with so much anger that my body sways because of how unstable I am.

Fuck

I can hear my own heavy breathing. I place my palms on my knees, trying to ignore the pain squeezing my chest. It hurts to the point that I can barely breathe.

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