Connected To Him (ManxMan)

Part 2: Career Complications

"Love never dies, it fizzles out maybe but it stays there in your heart buried by emotions controlling you. Once the fire is rekindled love breathes a new life." ~ Elizabeth E. Castillo

"Some stories go through long pauses like the spaces in between the notes. If it's in the stars our paths will collide again and how sweet the music will be." ~ The Better Man Project

"Somehow I always knew no matter how far we drifted away from each other, that we would find our way back together again." ~ The Better Man Project

Part 2: Career Complications

Ethan awoke with a gasp, his hand instinctively rising up to wipe at his face. The act was always done to search for saliva that escaped during the night and to Ethan's horror, he felt a thick streak running across his face. The large dark circle on Ethan's pillow explained it and a similar embarrassment filled his chest, despite the fact that he was a twenty-five-year-old adult.

Pulling off the pillowcase to throw it in the wash, Ethan caught a glance of his appearance in the circular mirror hung above his drawer. Ethan took in his wrinkled dress shirt, cuffed pants, and brown faux leather belt with a wince. It seemed as if during his musings about his past, he'd fallen asleep. Ethan pulled at his belt loop with a hiss, the slight sting from the movement irritating to say the least. While Ethan could have continued to berate himself for falling asleep in such uncomfortable clothes, he decided his time was much better spent getting ready for the day.

An hour later, Ethan searches through emails while drinking a cup of coffee. Spending so much time thinking about his adolescence reminded him of how strange it was to spend mornings not looking through phone notifications, but emails instead. I've really grown up, Ethan thought with a quiet chuckle.

That's how Clark found him when he walked out of his room. Ethan's carefree amusement seemed like a complete one-eighty from the way he barely held back tears the night before. Clark's plan had been to embrace this happiness. There was no use reminding Ethan of those unpleasant thoughts when he seemed so happy. But Clark's curiosity got the best of him, which is why, less than ten minutes later, he asked what Ethan was looking at the previous night.

"You just seemed really . . . "

"Sad?" Ethan completed, placing his mug down with a soft clink. "That's always how I look when I think about Chris."

"Chris," Clark repeated with a look of realization. "Of course. Why didn't you say that yesterday? You already told me everything about him."

"Yeah, you're right. I guess I just get used to trying to hide how I feel about . . . that situation," Ethan explained with a soft voice, eyes seeing nothing as he stared down at the table in front of him. "Most of the people in my life get worried when he comes up and I'm usually so focused on trying to make them feel better that I. . . "

"I get it," Clark interrupted, already understanding what Ethan was saying without him using the words. "I probably understand that more than anyone."

They were both silent for a moment, thinking back on their respective troubles. Yet, when Ethan stepped out of his own experience for only a second and thought about Clark, he found his worries to pale in comparison. He couldn't blame himself for Clark's feelings, but Ethan felt slightly responsible for pushing Clark to think about his past trauma. He and Clark were in Clark's hometown less than 72 hours before, he should only have good memories from that visit. As Clark's friend and guardian in Toronto, it was vital that Ethan rectified that.