Knock, knock

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After he has kissed me, I can tell that he is confident that it will become more than merely a kiss. The problem is, I am not quite sure what more than a kiss is. They kept us debutantes so in the dark, I did not know what would come after this kiss. All I knew is that I did not want this kiss to end.

My breath hitches as I feel his hands move from my waist, a little higher, so that they are resting on my chest. I feel a little embarrassed for he must feel just how fast my heart is beating at this moment. He must be able to feel how red hot my cheeks are as I flush. The way my heart is thumping so hard that I can feel it in my throat. "B-Benedict?"

"Yes, Matilda? Beautiful, perfect Matilda?" His lips cannot connect with mine as I talk, or maybe it is because they are quivering so much, so he moves to plant kisses along my jawline, and I flinch as he moves to my neck. "My dear, you are shaking. Is my kissing that disagreeable to you?"

"No... no, it is... quite the opposite..." I feel as though I must force every word out, barely able to think as his body is pressed against mine. His fingers begin to move downwards, so that they are now touching my bare breasts. He does not take any time in lifting them from my dress so that he might kiss them now too, and I stand, feeling a little benign. I want to touch him as well, kiss him and make his heart beat as fast as mine is but I have no idea how to do that. I have no idea. "Benedict-"

"Yes?" He speaks in a low voice, looking up at me with big eyes and a crooked grin. "I can stop if that is what you wish for, Matilda. Beautiful Matilda. You are as perfect as I knew you would be. Did you want me to stop?"

My heart skips a beat every time he says my name. It did before, of course, but especially right now. "No." I manage. "Don't stop."

"Whatever you want. I can stop whenever you want. You do not hesitate to ask, yes?" Only once I have nodded in eager agreement, do his hands move now. They jet to my waist, turning me around so that my face is pressed against the wood of the door. He is not harsh, but he is not exactly gentle, rather he is knowing. I assume he knows what he is doing and he knows what he wants, and he knows how to go about getting it. His fingers fiddle with the buttons on the back of my dress, loosening the bow, and I shiver as he runs his hand down my bare back. "You are so beautiful."

I twist my head to look at him, and he meets me with another kiss. It pushes my head against the door, one hand is beside me to keep me where I am, and the other has reached down to the hem of my dress at the bottom. He breaks away from kissing me so that he may take the material and tuck it up at the back. My bottom half is left bare apart from my stockings, my dress all caught up around my waist. He runs a hand up my thigh, and I press my head harder into the wooden door. "Benedict?"

"Yes, Matilda?" God... Matilda. The way he says my name. It could drive me crazy. I find myself a little more confident now, pulling his face to me so that he might kiss me again. I can feel him grinning into me, but he humours my whims, his hands adjusting his own clothing whilst our lips are still connected. His suspenders clatter, and he breaks away so that he can clip my stockings undone. I can feel him pressed against me, and everything in my mind is telling me just how wrong this is. How this is the kind of thing that ruins young ladies, I should not allow him to take my virtue but... how could I not when I feel this way right now? "You are so beautiful. You're all mine now, you know that?" His voice is low, he whispers into my ear.

"Benedict-" I groan, surprised myself at the noise that escapes my lips.

It makes him grin. "Shhh... shh... you're going to have to be so quiet, Matilda. So quiet. We cannot risk anyone catching us, so no matter how you feel, you cannot make a sound. You understand me?" I don't respond immediately, so he grips my face loosely to pull me to look at him. "You understand?"

"I understand." He plants a kiss on my lips, positioning himself to begin. Just as there's a loud knock at the door, before he can. He stays extremely still, and so I do as well, even though my legs are shaking so hard I am unsure how much longer I can stand. The knock is more insistent, and so he moves away from me, quietly beginning to put his clothes back on. Only when the knocking progresses to continuous, does he speak. "What?"

"It is me, Gregory! Only, we have been waiting so long for you to find us that we thought perhaps you had gotten confused and thought you were hiding!" His little brother yelps from behind the door. I loved Gregory, but I never hated him as much as I did now.

Once Benedict has himself presentable, he moves to assist me with my dress. He speaks as he does. "I apologise, Gregory! I shall be out in a mere moment, I was just searching this room extremely thoroughly!"

"Okay!" Gregory accepts this, and his little footsteps rush away from the room.

I cannot continue to play hide and seek, I am a mess. I am a state. I have never felt that way before, but I knew I wanted it again, and I wanted it with him. No matter how nervous that made me. He seems disappointed too, holding my face so that he might kiss me again. "We shall continue that again soon, Matilda. I promise you that."

💗 Authors note 💗

Sorry this update took so long! Because this is on my second account, I forgot about uploading. I'll try and make sure it's more regular from now on!

Thanks for sticking with me always,

Ruby xx

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