crawl ( f.w )

forty one.

i couldn't face taylor after my conversation with Grace so i decided to just head back to my own dorm with caleb. the walk back to our room was somewhat silent but caleb tried his best to cheer me up. i stared at my feet with my hood over my head while we walked through the rain.

a million thoughts were running through my head as caleb spoke. do i tell taylor what Grace said at all? do i sugarcoat it? do i actually break up with her to protect her? do we pretend to break up? nothing made sense in my mind and i ended up groaning out loud and rolling my eyes.

" i'm guessing you weren't listening to anything i was saying? " caleb said, turning his head to look at me. i pushed my hands into my pocket and remained silent.

caleb sighed and threw his head back. " finn dude, you cannot beat yourself up like this. "

" i don't know what to do. " i replied, my voice cracking. " i'm just stuck. "

" i promise you that we are all by your sides. you and taylor are not going through anything alone. " caleb said, trying his best to reassure me. " we're gonna figure something out. "

" i can't involve you guys into this drama. it's too much. " i stated, staring ahead. " i'll come up with something— "

before caleb could say anything gaten, joe, noah and jack appeared from thin air and began calling our names.

" finn! " gaten shouted, one of his hands were stuffed into the pocket of his green and black hoodie while the other one was waving in the air as we turned around.

" i ran into millie and she seemed pretty upset when i mentioned you, but she told me that you had to talk to us about something important. " gaten spoke, the distance between closing drastically.

soon we stood in front of each other and i explained what happened earlier to the four of my friends. a wave of anger appeared on gatens face, along with the rest of them.

" am i the only one who calls bullshit? " jack blurted, causing us to look at him.

" i can't take any chances jack. " i replied, running my hand over my face and taking a deep breath. " we start filming in a couple days and i don't wanna affect anyones acting or mood. "

everyone stood quiet for a minute. " i guess tell her after? we film for a couple weeks so maybe Grace might forget her little plan. "

" i don't know, i hope so. " i said, looking at noah doubtfully.

after talking for a few more minutes, we all ended up back at the dorms together and called it a day. once i reached my room, i closed my door and fell onto my bed.

***

9:57pm. i was startled out of my sleep as i felt my phone ringing right besides my head. i quickly lifted my head from my pillow and looked around my room in confusion, wondering when i fell asleep.

my senses found their way back to me and i eventually snapped my head towards my ringing phone and i felt my heart drop a little when i saw taylor calling me. my breath hitched as my fingers wrapped around my phone. soon, i heard the voice i'm in love with.

" finn? are you okay? i haven't heard from you all day. " taylor spoke, her voice anxious but soft.

i was silent, i simply didn't know what to say. i felt incredibly guilty speaking to her for some reason.