One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

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"No, Beck, that would be the most stupid weapon to try and use against a zombie," Sam said in an exasperated tone.

They had been having this conversation since we left the boys' house a little bit ago. Which random things you would find on the road would be best to fight off zombies. Cody and I had walked ahead of them and for the most part I was lost in my own world, checking out the little community that had managed to make it through the initial days of the apocalypse.

It only took about a week for the world to fall apart. Apparently there had been sightings and situations that had been kept from the public eye. They had a bunch of people in quarantined worldwide, under the pretense of it being some mundane disease. Soon, patients started dying, and it wasn't until they started coming back to life that they fully realized what was going on.

The initial outbreak had stemmed from somewhere in Australia, though the actual reason behind it was unknown to the general public, and only a few very high ups knew what had caused it. This had given everyone little hope for a cure, but at the same time they did have hope, and I think that's why I liked to believe there are a ton of communities just like this one.

I like to think there are people still trying to live as normal as possible because they believe that there might eventually be a cure.

The place that they had chosen was actually very pretty. It wasn't a bunch of two bedrooms but it wasn't mansions either. If I had to guess I would say it was where people who lived comfortably would have inhabited. There were hardly any one story houses and every house had a nice sized yard.

I was pretty distracted, so I can only imagine how many times the boys had said my name before they all made a group effort to shout at me, knocking me out of my daze, "Kodi!!!!"

I turned, noticing that they were all a good fifteen feet behind me, and looking at me with varying degrees of humor, "Hm?" was all I could say without sounding like a complete moron.

"Do you think a lamp could take out a zombie?" Beck asked, crossing his arms. I wasn't exactly sure how I could tell but I just knew that the lamp had been his idea and for some reason the boys had argued enough about it that they needed a third party opinion.

Sam let out a sigh of sorts and looked at me, his eyes held the playful air and he had the hint of a smile creeping on his lips. Cody stood a little ahead of the other two but it was obvious that whilst he had stopped to argue, I had absently walked ahead. Cody had his arms crossed and he wasn't scowling but, he had something that I could only call a resting grumpy face, though I knew he was anything but. I could see it in the relaxed way his arms were folded and the way his eyes seemed to ask instead of demand for answers.

I pursed my lips and thought it over. It didn't matter what I answered, I would be going against one or two of their opinions. So I went with the answer that would cost the least amount of damage to this new friendship, or at least I hope we were becoming friends, I went with my honest answer.

"Yeah, a lamp could theoretically take out a zombie. I mean, if it was a glass base then it would be a little tricky but I can see how that would work..." I trailed off, my cheeks heating up and I wondered how red they were.

Beck broke out into a heart stopping grin and I swear my heart literally skipped a pitter patter. He walked over to me in a couple big steps and scooped me up into a hug, "Hah! Suckers! She's on my side!"

Cody looked amused as he shook his head, I saw him over Beck's shoulder as Beck tried squeezing me to death. Sam pouted but winked at me to let me in on the playful nature, and I wheezed a little, pushing on Beck's chest.

"Can't.. breathe..."

Beck chuckled and I felt the sound vibrate into my toes, making me laugh as he put me down, he slung an arm around my shoulder and Cody came up behind him and thumped him upside the head.

"No, she just pities the underdog, because she's so nice," he said, confidently. Sam caught up and we all started walking again as Cody continued, "isn't that right Kodi?"

He looked at me, his eyes expectant, "Nope," I shook my head, making the 'p' sound pop a little.

Cody raised an eyebrow but didn't really seemed phased with me disagreeing, he actually looked a little happy and I wasn't quite sure why, as I would have expected him to be a little upset that I didn't agree with him, again.

"Oh?" he asked, and that seemed to be all the prodding that I needed to continue to make my point.

"Mhm, I think the lamp is a very practical idea, one someone wouldn't normally think of but in all actualities it might save a life one day."

Sam just grinned and Cody chuckled, "Awh, Cody isn't she cute. Trying to pretend she knows everything about zombies and how to take them out," Sam asked, in a teasing tone.

His tone might have been teasing but it still kind of stung. I knew he didn't know fully why I never went out of my house, and I knew for a fact that he didn't know the solitude dated back much more than a month and a half. But the fact that he was treating me as if I didn't know how to handle myself, and didn't know anything about the world that I lived in hit too close to home.

My step mother had also used the same kinds of words and sayings to tell me why I was to stay inside. I wouldn't know how to take care of myself. I would be abducted and raped, killed and sold, or worse, I would be found out by the neighbors. They would find out that I was a fake, the result of an affaire, the result of my father's 'whore'. Not that my step mother ever left the house anyways. Not that she knew the neighbors.

I didn't respond and instead turned to Beck, making sure not to look at either Cody or Sam, as they both had upset me. Sam for saying those things despite being knowledgeable about the significance, and Cody for trying to tell me how I should be thinking.

I'm my own person, and I didn't leave one place of controlment to be stuffed into another.

Some part of my brain told me that it really wasn't their faults, and they didn't know the effect that their words had really had. But the other part was hurt and a little bit angered.

"Beck?" I asked, noting the difference in my tone, it was dull and a bit unplugged, "Where's this gym place?"

His eyes seemed to ask me a million questions, and I wasn't in the right state of mind to pick out what they were by just a look. I knew one thing though, what had just been a good moment, a moment that I felt relaxed and sort of part of the group, was now ruined by my overactive brain.

I rubbed my arm and looked away from Beck, I could tell that my arms were probably getting a nice sunburn but that wasn't really what I was thinking about.

"Well," he scratched his forehead and then ran his fingers through his hair, "It's just up there in that blue building..."

He didn't get to finish though because I had already started running. It felt great. The building wasn't far away but it was far away enough to let my legs stretch out. Don't get me wrong, I don't run. But it was times like this that I felt like if I didn't run, my problems, fears, and doubts would all overtake me in one big tidal wave.

I heard Sam shout after me and Cody say something to Sam but I didn't stop until I had reached the blue building, and even then I made a rash decision and just ran right on past it. Now that I had no destination in mind I let my mind have the back burner and I let my feet take over.

My lungs started to burn but I bent into the ache and soon the cramp was gone. The wind ripped through the loose strands of my hair as I left the boys and my problems behind.

For now at least.

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