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deadly games ❝stargazing❞
BREATHING HAS NEVER FELT SO HARD BEFORE. It was almost like the air you were taking in was getting stuck in your lungs. Your eyebrows were twitching, your hands were sweating and you felt like throwing up. The blimp that exploded in front of you was the symbol of his death. You didn't care about the physical pain you were going through because of the sudden explosion, all you cared about was the fact that another person you cared for, died. You will never get used to this feeling, the constant pain in your chest will always grow whenever you watched one of your loved ones give their last breath. All of this and for what? Your next win isn't guaranteed. Nothing is. When will all the suffering stop? All the sacrifices, tears and fights.
You closed your eyes with pressure, still in denial over what just happened. It should've been me. Not him. You refused to open your eyes, even though the images were still clear in your head. He'd want you to move on and don't look back, you knew that. But you couldn't turn your back to him.
Eventually, your legs started to work again. Every step you took away from the game area felt hard. The hardest thing you had to do would probably be this. The exact moment when you walked away from one of the most amazing people you met in the borderlands. You were sad, knowing that he'd never get to live his dream that you two talked about.
Keiju had a kind soul. He made you see the bright side of things and also saved your life multiple times. You'd never be able to repay him for what he did for you. Even if he lived, you knew he wouldn't ask anything from you in return. Because that's just how he was. Thanks to him, you get to live more. And this was the best way to repay him. Living your life, trying to survive until you will finally return to the original world.
When you stopped smelling the smoke and hear the burning, you finally fell to the ground. Your hands were covering your wet face, you didn't even realize how hard you were sobbing until then. This was the first time you sobbed over a death in one of your games. You felt bad for all of them, but Keiju was a friend. A close friend.
Now you were all alone in the borderlands.
It felt so hard to breathe, but you kept trying to take deep breaths. Until it finally returned at it's usual pace. Your hand wiped the tears off your face and then, you laid your entire body on the dark empty road. The stars were so beautiful. You hoped the rest of your friends were still alive, watching the stars just like you. Because a beautiful thing like the sky at night was worth to watch. Even if it was happening in the terrible circumstences you were going through.
You never really took the time before to admire the stars. The people telling you how relaxing it is, were right. Even your brother, Haru, bragged to you about the first time he took a girl on a date. They went to a drive-in, a perfect place to stargaze. The girl enjoyed it enough to let your older brother take her out again. Until she became his first girlfriend. Her name was Amaya, and she was a nice girl. They were very in love from what you remembered. But they had to break up when Haru went to the States.
