I am NOT your little "meow meow"

Wilbur isnt doing too good

TW: mentions of suicidal ideation

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It's been about a week since Tommy was adopted by the tuna man, whose name was apparently Wilbur, but Tommy preferred to call him "tuna man" because he was a man that gave him tuna.

Anyway, Wilbur had a twin brother, Technoblade, who was the scary dude with pink hair, and a father, Phil, who was a super famous businessman or something. Tommy honestly didn't care, he just wanted food.

At first, Phil wasn't too happy that Wilbur brought a kitten home, but Wilbur whined like a child and eventually got his way, as long as he fed, bathed, and took care of Tommy. When Wilbur agreed, Phil all but officially adopted the kitten.

So now, Wilbur had a tabby kitten with yellow and cream-colored fur, eyes as blue as the diamonds on their chandelier (seriously, these people were loaded), and a cute red collar with a tag that had the name "Jubilee Theseus Watson" that totally didn't stay on his neck whenever he shifted into his human form.

Tommy couldn't help but scoff at the name on the tag. It would be a couple of hours before Phil got off work, so Tommy could be in his human form for a bit.

"Seriously, what kind of name is 'Jubilee Theseus Watson'!?" Tommy complained on the phone to Ranboo.

"Why do you have three names? For all they know, you're a cat."

Tommy shrugged, despite the fact that his friend couldn't see. "I don't fuckin' know. Wilbur wanted to name me Jubilee after a fucking train, Techno wanted to name me Theseus because he's a fuckin' nerd, and Phil decided to make a compromise."

"That's Fuckin' stupid," Tubbo said.

Tommy beamed at his best friend's voice. "Yeah, it is. But they treat me well, so it's okay I guess."

Tubbo paused for a moment. "They're treating you well?"

"I mean, yeah. Dude, these guys are rich as fuck. They keep feeding me the best quality cat food, the best pet shampoo, and are just great overall."

"That's...great. Hey, uh, what's their address?"

Tommy furrowed his eyebrows. "I don't know, why?"

"He wants to kidnap you and steal all their money," Ranboo explained.

"It's not kidnapping if I know him!" Tubbo argued in the background.

Tommy rolled his eyes fondly. "No, I don't know their address, and I don't want to risk a neighbor seeing me. Though I promise to tell you once I find out."

"You better." Tubbo threatened as he hung up.

Tommy giggled. Then his fondness quickly turned into fear as he heard the door being unlocked.

Is someone home already? But Phil shouldn't be off for a couple more hours?

Regardless, he had shifted into his cat form by the time the door opened, revealing an exhausted-looking Wilbur and an annoyed Technoblade.