Mistakes We Can't Laugh About (Loser #2)

Chapter 11

Chapter 11

When I saw him walk out the door, I knew that our chances of being together were over.

Ni hindi ko alam na posible palang matapos ang isang bagay na hindi pa naman nagsisimula.

I fixed my eyes on his chair and tried to picture him sitting there, looking at me through his glasses while I answered back to our instructor's question. His eyes were gleaming with joy, but as he rose, he would contradict my claim, causing me to roll my eyes in anger.

He was right. He had always been a rival to me. Lagi kong iniisip ang masama sa kanya. Lagi akong nagagalit kasi mas magaling siya.

That's the only way he'll ever be in my life, and that's how it should stay.

Leon is a good and smart guy. Soon, he'll see how unworthy I am of him. Kapag nakahanap na siya ng babaeng hindi mahirap pakitunguhan gaya ko, babaeng hindi siya mapapagod intindihin, babaeng titingnan lahat ng maganda sa kanya, mapagtatanto niyang walang kagusto-gusto sa akin.

Ayokong maging katulad siya kay Jin. Ayokong marinig sa bibig niya na nakakasawa ako at masyadong maarte. I don't think I can ever take hearing that from another person. Sapat nang nalaman kong malaki akong abala para sa iba.

Masakit . . . pero alam kong ito ang tama.

Leon deserves a woman who will be proud of him every time he does something good, not a woman who will wish him to fail so she can succeed . . . so she can get ahead.

I don't want to take him down with me. I don't want my insecurities to bother him.

Isa pa, we had goals to attain. Kailangan niyang magpanggap na nobyo ni Psyche para sa lupain nila, at kung magiging kasintahan niya ako ay hindi ko alam kung kaya kong makitang may hawak siyang iba.

Sa kaso ko naman, alam kong kailangan ko siyang talunin para patuloy na manirahan sa apartment. At kung sakaling maging kasintahan ko siya, malaki ang tyansa na magbago ang nararamdaman ko tungkol do'n.

I might be okay with losing . . . I might be okay with him always winning.

Killing the flame before it burns is for the best. Turning him down before he directly confesses is for the best.

Sana lang ay hindi dumating ang araw na magsisi ako.

"Congrats, Amari!" sigaw nina Shaira at Zoey habang tumatakbo palapit sa akin.

I smiled at them. "Thanks."

"Hindi ka ba manlilibre d'yan?" tanong pa ni Shaira.

I snickered. Nakaupo lang kami sa benches sa tapat ng building namin, hinihintay na dumating si Ms. Lubrica, dahil magpapapapirma kami ng clearance. I arrived here before them because they went to look at the bulletin board where the names of students who had made it onto the Dean's list were posted there.

"Congrats," bulong ko kay Zoey na ngayon ay second placer na.

Matamis siyang ngumiti sa akin. "Grabe, third year na tayo."

I allowed my back to relax and watched the students stroll past the pathways.

I made it. I became the top psychology student again alongside Leon, as we both have 1.13 general point averages. It was good enough for me. Wala naman kaming napagkasunduan ni Dad na bawal ang may ka-tie.

I knew that if I maintained my current line of average, I would graduate as Summa Cum Laude; yet, it wasn't even the aim, and that wouldn't make my father proud. Isa lang ang dapat kong gawin. I have to be the batch valedictorian.