I'm Sorry

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The following practice, Adam shows up with a sling. He and Ellie still hadn't talked desptie his best efforts. She acted as if he wasn't even around, still hurt by his betrayal. Ellie was happy to see that he had taken Coach Bombay's advice and was going to be sitting out until his wrist no longer hurt. She was always going to care about him, always wanting the best for him. However, she was finding it hard to trust him. If he could lie to her about something as simple as an injury, what else could he lie to her about? She just needed time to think.

Coach Bombay had them working on all kinds of drills, preparing themselves for the game against Canada. Luis was still working on his stopping... and still falling. He was getting better though, the improvement was night and day. Fulton was working on his soft hands, learning that he could shoot in other ways besides his slapshot. 

"Nice shot, Ellie!" She hears from both Coach Bombay and Julie as she slides the puck into the net. Most of the team was still struggling with getting shots past Julie, but that was something Ellie had mastered early on. She had been trying to teach her other teammates, but Julie was just too good. It left Ellie to wonder why Coach Bombay hadn't let her play yet. Goldberg got some lucky saves, but he was pretty easy to score on. Putting Julie in the goal would be a huge asset to them. 

As she skates to the back of the line, Ellie could feel eyes on her. She didn't have to turn her head to know that it was Adam who was staring at her. He had been staring at her all practice, but she gave in anyway and looked in his direction. A small smile appears on his face now that she was at least looking at him. She had been avoiding making eye contact since their fight. This gave Adam hope, maybe it was a step in the right direction. Maybe, she would actually let him talk to her. All he wanted to do was talk. 

The glance in Adam's direction was quick, not wanting to spend more than a few seconds looking at him. If she did, all the pain she was feeling would disappear. The comfort his blue eyes held had the ability to make everything okay. But everything wasn't okay. She couldn't just look at him and have everything suddenly be okay again. They needed to talk about what happened and figure out how they wanted to proceed. It wasn't going to be an easy conversation, but it had to be done. 

Adam had tried to talk to her after practice, but she had managed to sneak out of the locker room without him noticing. Maybe she wasn't ready to talk to him after all. "You okay?" Charlie asks as they head back to the dorms, noticing how sad his best friend had been acting lately. 

Adam usually wasn't one to confide in other people with his problems, but maybe Charlie could help him out just this once. "Ellie and I got into a fight the other day. I've been trying to talk to her, wanting to apologize, but she keeps ignoring me." 

"Oh, so that's why you two haven't been all lovey-dovey lately." Charlie tried making the situation light-hearted, knowing how upset Adam was. They never fought and Adam was always happy whenever she was around. The sad face he had been sporting started making a lot more sense. 

"Charlie, seriously. What do I do?" Adam was starting to lose his mind not being able to talk to Ellie. This was the first time since they met that they hadn't spoken to each other. It felt like his entire world was falling apart. He always told himself, if he didn't have hockey at least he had Ellie. Now that wasn't even true. The two things he cared most about were gone. 

"Just don't give up, Adam. Go to her dorm tonight, ask her to talk. If she says no, go again tomorrow. Show her that you care, that you're not going to give up on her. She'll talk to you eventually. The way you talk about her, I know she isn't the type of girl you intend on letting go." 

Adam decided to take Charlie's advice on knocked on the door of her dorm. He was just hoping that she wanted to talk to him. He would wait until the end of time for her, but the sooner he got to hold her again the better. The feeling he got when she had her arms wrapped around him, or he held his hand in his, was something he was craving. He felt like he couldn't function properly. 

"Is Ellie here?" He was bummed when it was Connie who answered the door and not Ellie, but he just needed to see her. He needed to talk to her. 

"Who is it, Connie?" Her voice calls out from inside the room. A laugh escapes her lips, and it was angelic. He missed everything about her, but her voice and her laugh was what he missed the most. The two brought light into his world when everything felt dark. 

"Your boyfriend!" The laugh he once heard was no longer present. The shimmer of brightness he once had was now gone. There he stood like a dark cloud, gloomy and depressed. 

"Can we talk?" His voice didn't mean to crack as he asked the question, but he couldn't help it. His entire world stood before him, seeming okay, and he felt like he was going to break into pieces. She may have been in her pajamas, but she looked more beautiful than ever. 

Ellie debated if she was ready to talk to Adam or not. It had been hell not being able to speak to him, but she needed time away from him. The time to herself gave her a lot of time to think about their relationship. Everything was picture perfect up until their fight and that was something that messed with her head. "Yeah." 

The two silently sat on a bench outside the dorms, both looking up at the night sky. The last time they were looking at the sky, they were happy. This time both of their worlds were flipped upside down. If only they had the ability to go back in time. 

"I'm so sorry," Adam finally croaks out. He had been wanting to say this since the second their fight had finished. He knew he was in the wrong and Ellie didn't deserve the way he had acted toward her. She had been nothing but a caring and loving girlfriend, and he let some stupid insecurity ruin it. "I shouldn't have snapped at you. You were just trying to help me and I was a total ass to you. God, Ellie, if I could go back in time, I would. I know you can't change the past, but I would do anything to go back to that moment and change how I reacted. You didn't deserve that."

"I just don't understand how you could lie to me like that? You've been my best friend since we were four and you've never lied to me before. I never thought you could betray my trust like that." Hearing Adam on the verge of tears broke Ellie's heart. She hated how much he was hurting, knowing she was hurting just the same. 

"Lying to you was the hardest thing I've ever done. It broke my heart every time I did, but I just couldn't bring myself to tell you the truth. Admitting I was actually injured was something I couldn't face. I told myself to just push through the pain. That it would be worth it in the end because I would've gotten noticed by the scouts and everything I've been working towards would finally pay off. But after our fight, I realized that pushing myself that hard wasn't worth it. You are more important than hockey. I thought I couldn't live without hockey, but truthfully, I can't live without you. I am who I am because of you. I love playing hockey because of you. I truly started falling in love with the game when you asked me to teach you. I still remember the way your face lit up when you scored your first goal."

"Adam..." Ellie was in tears, listening to what Adam had to say. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. Adam Banks loved hockey, everyone knew that, but hearing him say he loved it because of her made her heart explode. 

"Ellie, I love you so much more than I could ever put into words. I want you to know that. I know I messed up, and I know you probably don't trust me at this moment. But Ellie I swear to you, I will do everything I can to make it up to you, to get you to trust me again. I just can't take not being able to talk to you or hold you in my arms. God Ellie, you have no idea how much I need you in my life. Please forgive me." 

"God I love you, Adam Banks." The way they felt fireworks and butterflies when they kissed was enough to make all the pain they were feeling go away. Once again, everything felt right in their world.



Author's Note:

PSA: Adam Banks is a SIMP and i am here for it. This man would be the perfect boyfriend i SWEAR. He is so in love with Ellie gahhh *chef's kiss* why must he be a fictional character????

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