Twenty-Nine-I'm Sorry 7.5

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Tris

We wrap up my physical training at the gym for the day and go to our apartments to shower.  I stride straight back to the bathroom in this giant space and I'm still in awe from this place.  There's a separate shower and bathtub.  I could more than fit my entire old bathroom in the shower alone.  It's just ridiculously huge and luxurious.  I'm not accustomed to luxury whatsoever and this feels almost uncomfortable.  I step in and turn the water on trying to relax.  I take a shower at lightning speed and get out drying myself with the familiar scent of my towels.  That soothes my discomfort—the familiarity and normalcy of something so simple. 
I realize I didn't bring clothes in here and I pray Eric doesn't walk in because I know he can even though it's locked.  I wrap my towel tightly around myself and go straight to my bedroom in a hurry.  I open a drawer to choose from my meager options to see it's full of clothes.  I open up every single one and they're all filled.  I pick up a shirt and it's nice—brand new.  It's my size.  There are no holes and it's not threadbare.  I see tons of pants, shorts, workout clothes, socks—even bras and underwear.  I don't know how I feel about that—grateful, yet completely uncomfortable since they're the right sizes.  I grab everything I need for now and put it on.  It's really nice to have new clothes.  I forgot about how wonderful having something that wasn't stretched out or overly worn felt.  Out of curiosity, I step over to my closet and see the same worn pair of heels I've had forever, but there are several pairs of athletic shoes, boots, and even more dress shoes of a variety.  The hanging rack is filled with dresses, pantsuits, and shirts.  There are even a few skirts.  I frown at how sweet this is. 
I take a new pair of tennis shoes and lace them up before going back to the bathroom to comb out my hair.  I do so quickly and squeeze the excess water out. 
I hear a knock on my door and rush down the hall to open it.  It's Eric. 
"Come with me," he insists with a wave of his hand. 
"Wait.  I need my key," I say going back to the bathroom and pulling it out of my pants pocket. 
I toss the laundry in my hamper and come back down to find my door open and Eric's as well.  I sigh as I lock my door and follow him into his apartment. 
I step inside and notice that it's kind of small compared to the monstrosity he gave me.  It's much more cozy.  It's a bit bigger, maybe double the size of the two bedroom space Christina and I used to share but the living space is nice—snug and filled with furniture.  I shut the door and see a massive bookcase covering the entire wall here.  It's beautiful—a built-in piece of furniture with shelves up to the ceiling as well as books stuffed full.  There's actually no extra room for any more that I can see.  I hear something like a blender start up as I round the corner.  He's there making something at his countertop.  He has a smaller kitchen than my current one but it's really nice and functional.  There's a peninsula that I'm standing beside with a high countertop and barstools.  His stove is just below that with what appears to be a lower countertop extending as far as I can see.  I peer over to see a sink down there.  The refrigerator is against the wall on the other side of the galley-style kitchen with a countertop and cupboards. 
"Here.  Drink," Eric says putting a glass of something in front of me. 
"What is this?" I ask eyeing the tall glass of mysterious contents of which the exact shade is sort of indeterminate.  It's kind of a pale puce or peach color with swirls of blue.  It has flecks of green, red, and blue spread throughout. 
"I'm not poisoning you," he sighs rolling his eyes. 
"I didn't say you were," I laugh lightly sitting in a barstool.  "I'm just curious of the contents since it's unidentifiable."
I take a sip and it's not bad... but it's not exactly good either. 
He opens his cupboard and places two jars in front of me on the raised peninsula countertop.  I read on the label that one is a protein shake with vitamins to aid in muscle building.  The other is a recovery blend to support the body with over-workout stress.  It's supposed to help me continue on daily without the associated body aches of a heavy workout. 
"It's half and half with fruit and vegetables added to make it more palatable since this one on it's own is disgusting.  I only glugged that stuff down during my leadership training and haven't touched it since," he explains putting the jars away.  "That's what Dana advised me to give you."
I nod in understanding and sip the weird, fluffy concoction while he washes his blender.  I admire him in his leadership vest.  He's got a black polo shirt on underneath that and some cargo pants.  I see him wearing his holster with two firearms.  He always wears those.  I notice his new tattoo peeking out from his sleeve.  It does look good—probably my best work. 
"Did you use that ointment?" I ask sipping the drink. 
"Yeah," he laughs.  "It already feels healed."
"It probably is," I nod finishing the drink.  He takes the glass from me and washes it. 
"Come on.  Let's go down to lunch," he says. 
I rise from the barstool and he rounds the counter.  I notice him actually checking me out from head to toe. 
"Can you please refrain from doing that?" I sigh tiredly. 
He blinks and meets my eyes.  "Sorry, it's just... are those new?" he questions. 
Now, I'm the one to blink in surprise.  "Yes," I say raising my voice in intonation. 
"You look nice," he replies. 
"Thanks," I say softly. 
We step out and make our way to the cafeteria for lunch.  I don't know if I'll be able to eat with all that shake-thing in my system but I'm still oddly a little hungry.  We arrive and I wave to my friends.  Four is staring at me. 
"Come on," Eric says leading me to the line. 
I'm about to grab some food but Eric insists I have more protein. He actually makes me a plate and then himself. I smile at how sweet he actually is. I've never had anyone care so much for me before. Even my closest friends didn't notice.
We sit up at the leadership table and I get to sit with Lydia this time. I've never talked with her before. She's sweet and funny but a little intrusive with the private life info, asking what's going on between Eric and me. I tell her he's my trainer... and my friend. I see him pause for a moment mid-bite when I say it. He appears touched at that.
"Have you seen any initiates in here?" Eric asks Ryan.
"Nope," he replies.
Eric sighs and looks to me. "We're making a stop before we go to the offices."
I nod in understanding. He's probably checking on them. I remember him coming in the dorm once and telling us to eat and hit the training room. He does care.
We finish our meal and walk side by side to the dorms. We arrive at the Dauntless-born's first. Eric tells them all something similar to what I remember him saying to us. I see several standing and moving toward the exit. He makes sure they all leave. We walk out and head to the transfers' dorm but he stops me partway.
"Will you do me a favor?" he asks me earnestly.
"What is it?" I reply.
"The pretty blonde—the one with the long hair and blue eyes—can you stop her and tell her you want to talk with her?" he asks me seriously.
"But I don't want to talk with her. That's a lie, Eric," I respond uneasy.
He sighs, "You're not Candor."
"No, I'm a Christian. Christians don't lie... or at least feel awful when they do," I say remembering so many times that I have. I feel terrible and guilty whenever I do and I don't like it.
"You do want to talk with her," he insists. "You want to tell her that I want to talk with her."
I huff in irritation but I'll do this for him. He's done so much for me lately and hasn't asked for anything in return. He goes inside and says the same thing as the last group while I wait outside the door. They begin to file out of the room and I watch them go. I see a blonde girl with a really short cut and brown eyes. The next blonde is a tall boy with a wide, strong build and a tan—ex-Amity clearly. There's a slightly overweight girl with shoulder length blonde hair and green eyes. I pass her up and I see a tall, willowy girl with long blonde hair and gorgeous blue eyes. She's a knockout. I remember Eric looking at her in the sim waiting room and it feels like a punch to my stomach that he wants to talk with her. I do as I'm asked, though, and reach for her.
"Can I talk to you for a minute?" I ask her.
She looks to me surprised but forces a smile and nods.
Everyone else walks away and I take her down the hallway in the opposite direction from the cafeteria. I turn around the corner and face this beautiful girl that has Eric's attention. I feel self-conscious but I tell her that Eric wants to talk with her.
"Really?" she says excitedly.
I nod and turn away. Eric hugs her as soon as he rounds the corner. It feels like a stab to my chest.
"How are you feeling?" he asks concerned. His voice is so tender and caring.
"A little freaked out but okay compared to the rest," she tells him.
"Good. Make sure you eat every meal. Exercise when you're not in training. Go to bed at a reasonable time and if you can't sleep, just try to relax and rest. Tell the others, too. Go shopping or something—tattoos and piercings, even. You guys got more points deposited on Visiting Day," Eric advises.
It actually sounds nice what he's telling her. He said to take care of the other initiates...
"I will," she nods. She hugs him again and they separate and look at me... as I awkwardly stand here trying not to feel inadequate and uncomfortable.
"This is Tris," he introduces me.
"Hi," I say quietly.
"This is Beatrice?" she questions in shock.
I wince at my given name but she doesn't notice and takes me in a bone-crushing bear hug like Eric.
"I haven't seen you since I was five," she says.
"Huh?" I ask confused. I've never met her before besides the waiting room.
Eric whispers in her ear and she frowns... and then looks to me sadly.
"I'm Elizabeth," she introduces gently, shaking my hand. "I'm Eric's sister."
"Oh," I say surprised.
"You look just like your mother. I thought you looked familiar," she tells me.
"I don't look anything like my mom," I deny.
"Well... you have your dad's hair and eyes but you have her face... just like Caleb," she says and I stare at her confused. She knows my whole family, yet I don't know her. She does look familiar though, like someone I know but I just can't place my finger on it.
"You should probably get going," Eric says.
"Okay," she nods. "Caleb says he misses you and he was wrong... the last time you spoke. He says he misses you and he wishes you'd visit him or your parents next Visiting Day," she says to me before she says goodbye to us both. I wipe a tear from my eye before Eric sees it.

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