Once Upon Online

chapter 134

"Ervin! I don't like that" Eva says in a frustrated tone.

I look to see what they're doing and it's Ervin trying to tickle Eva. He's going through this phase where he finds tickling others fun.

"Ervin, please stop!" Eva says again.

I normally don't try to intervene with what they're doing at first. I usually give them time to see if they can resolve their conflict on their own.

"Mommy, Ervin won't stop" Eva ask for me now.

I walk to them and I lower myself so Ervin and I are almost face to face.

"Ervin, didn't you hear your sister asking you stop?" He nods his head.

"Then why didn't you stop?" I ask.

"I... I was. It's fun" Ervin says.

"But did she think it's fun if she's asking you to stop?" And he shakes his head.

"We respect each other's boundaries right? It's her body and if she doesn't like being tickled then you should respect that" I explain.

"Just like when you don't like it when she tries to carry you sometimes" I add.

"Do you understand?" I say in a very calm manner.

He goes to Eva, "I sorry."

"It's okay" Eva accepts his apology.

"Can I hug?" Ervin ask.

"Yes" Eva hugs him tight.

I smile as I stand up. Ryujin and I have been teaching them how to properly communicate their emotions. We've been teaching them about respecting each other's bodies as well.

Of course they're kids so they still have their moments of tantrums and we let them express their emotions in that way but then we talk to them afterwards so we can understand what caused them to act that way and hopefully find an alternative solution for the future.

We never punish the kids as well. Whenever they do something they shouldn't have, we always communicate with them that what they did wasn't good and why. At first, I was hesitant because there's no way they would understand any of it but I was surprised when the more we did that kind of parenting, the more it worked.

The other day, Ervin started jumping on everything and it was unsafe so Ryujin had to talk to him that whenever he has the urge to jump, he should go to his mini trampoline in the playroom because it's meant for jumping and it has bars he can hold.

Communicating with the kids is something I really struggled with at first. It's not surprising considering it's what I struggled with Ryujin in the beginning of our relationship.

It was engraved in my brain that as a parent, I know what's best for my kids so I make all the decisions for them and that I need to discipline them right away when they do something wrong.

Ryujin then helped me realize that even though their kids, they can still feel overwhelmed with their emotions and if they don't know how to let it out in a healthy way then that's when they start acting out.

After Ryujin talked to me about the benefits of gentle parenting, I decided to give it a shot and I'm happy I did. The kids are so young but they can express their feelings to us better than I ever did to my parents.

I also love the fact that they can confidently say no to someone when they don't want to be touched. It's something I wish I could have done when I was younger.

"Love you Eva" Ervin says.

"Love you too" Eva finally stops hugging him and they go back to playing.