Feel Something

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"Your dad's a gang leader?!"

Jungkook immediately shushed you. "Keep your voice down. I don't need the whole city knowing."

"But h-how is this even possible?" you questioned him, your brows knitted in perplexity.

"People want drugs, and my dad provides them," he stated. "It's that simple."

"How're you so calm about it though? I—this is—god, Kook," you groaned, lost for words. "It's fucking insane!"

"I grew up with it, that's why. I'd come home from school and see my dad and his pushers weighing cocaine on the coffee table. I'd even help them bag it for some extra spending money," he laughed dryly. "But at least I had a job, right?"

"Why do I have a feeling that wasn't all you did for your father."

"Well, it was until I graduated high school. After that, he told me he wouldn't send me to college unless I worked for him full-time," Jungkook apprised. "He offered me a 'special position' because I was his son."

"What was the position?"

"Underboss," he revealed. "My father wanted me to be his second in command."

"Did you accept his offer?"

Jungkook shook his head. "I couldn't handle that much responsibility, especially if I was gonna go to school. So, he gave me a different job instead—an associate. And after that, I basically became his bitch," he asserted. "Since I have a black belt in Taekwondo, whenever someone crossed my father or didn't pay him the money he was owed, I was the guy who took care of it. But if you know anything about the roles in these types of organizations, then you'd know I was doing the job of an enforcer, not an associate. He just used me for my strength."

You grimaced. "I'm afraid to ask what you meant by 'took care of it'."

"I didn't kill anybody or anything, so don't freak out. I just made them wish they were dead. Hell, I wished I were dead too," he imparted. "Every fucking day in that business was a living nightmare. I'd go home after work and get drunk or high in hopes I wouldn't wake up and have to repeat the same shit over again. I just wanted it to end; I wanted my life to end."

Tears began to well in your eyes, and you rested your cheek on Jungkook's shoulder in an attempt to conceal the heartache; however, he noticed when you failed at containing a sniffle.

"Hey," Jungkook cooed, stroking your hair lovingly. "Why're you crying?"

You sniffled again. "Because you were hurting so much that you didn't want to be alive anymore."

"Everything's okay now," he murmured. "I'm still here."

"But you almost weren't," you lamented.

Jungkook pressed a kiss to your temple, once more repeating, "Everything's okay now."

"P-Promise me?"

"I promise," he solaced. "I escaped that life, and I'm no longer affiliated with my father or The Black Swans."

"How did you manage to leave?"

"It wasn't without a fight, but my dad still believes I'll take over for him one day. That's probably why he didn't send a hitman after me."

"He'd actually kill you?" you gasped. "What kind of sick fuck would do that to their kid?"

"In his world, flesh and blood mean nothing if you defy your leader."

***

The next thirty minutes were spent trying to console you. Jungkook rubbed your back while whispering words of comfort in your ear. It helped a little bit, although you couldn't stop thinking about how he rather have been dead than work for his father.

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