The Bodyguard

30.

double update because ive been away for too long :(

present day
washington d.c.

Jasper watched the city, come alive that night.

A joint was perch between his middle and ring finger as he took small calm puffs to ease his nerves.

He never smoked unless he was stressed or lonely or perhaps even sad, although he wouldn't admit to the last one.

And seeing as he was at least two out of those three things, a joint would have to suffice.

He liked D.C. It felt like a breath of fresh air away from the city, even though it was just as busy and filled with just as much despair.

Maybe it was because New York reminded him of everything he hated about himself.

Everything besides Ace.

The thought of Ace made him feel sick.

Almost 2 weeks have passed since he last seen him and it was every bit of torment that he expected.

Two weeks since Ace left him without the decency of an explanation.

It was the longest they'd ever been a part since they first met. And Jasper was doing his due diligence of ignoring Ace no matter how hard he hated himself for it.

He didn't want to admit that it was killing him. It was killing him because each day that Ace wasn't here he felt like a lesser version of himself.

Like Ace had taken a part of him away. And how pathetic was that? To let someone capture you?

But it had already happened. It was happening.

And Jasper was stubborn and in denial most of the time and cold and he hated most people.

But even he couldn't deny it.

He tried and tried but he couldn't deny what Ace made him feel.

It was a revelation that he already grappled with but it was as if Ace leaving him had solidified it even further.

Jasper White had feelings for Ace.

And those feelings weren't going away. Not with distance and no matter how hard Jasper try to ignore them.

The joint was almost gone by the time he came back down to earth. Burnt pieces of ash fell to the ground beside him. His balcony allowed him to see the city in its entirety but even that wasn't enough.

His thoughts were his greatest enemy because they only consisted of Ace and how the guard had ripped everything away from him by leaving.

The thing was, Jasper brought it upon himself. He was so fucking stubborn that he wouldn't pick up the phone and call the one person who could make him feel better.

Simply because he wanted Ace to feel what he felt the night he told him he was leaving. He'd given them hours.

And maybe Ace thought it wasn't a big deal but it was a big deal to Jasper. Because it meant Ace trust him. Or at least he didn't trust him enough.

Which was far worse than not trusting him at all.

"You must be stressed."

The voice was enough to startle him but when he turned back and saw who it was he relaxed slightly and fought the urge to roll his eyes. Lucas.

"Hm. What makes you say that?"

"You only ever smoke when you're stressed, so."

Jasper didn't bother asking how Lucas got into his room, or found him in the first place.