21- stay here forever (first irl)

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July 31, 2020

This is my very first irl for this series 🥹 It's not essential to read but definitely gives A LOT of insight into their relationship. It goes back and forth between the present, and different memories Béatriz has. It's very long so buckle up 🤭

Being home in Pennsylvania is so refreshing. The fresh scent of the trees surrounding the house for acres and acres are stunning. The Jasmine and Lilac flowers are planted right below my room and when just the right breeze blows, the scent will drift through my open windows into my room surrounding the place. I even love the things my siblings hate, like being awakened to my dad mowing the lawn. Something about that sound deserves to be on the soundtrack for summer.

Waking up early has never really bothered me if it was for taking care of the farm. Ines would be complaining the whole time while we put our boots on over our pajamas with our messy hair from just waking up. My mom was brewing coffee and she would join us later after she was done watering the flowers, something I loved tagging along to do.

I would run to the barn so I could be the first to feed Sweetheart. The cow we named because she has cute little hearts all over her. The only one I seemed to have competition with was Blaise. While everyone else was still trying to wake up taking their slow steps up to the barn he would be right on my tail making sure I knew it wasn't just me.

He loves Sweetheart just as much as I do. When we were younger we'd be up in the fields for hours just talking with her. Blaise swore she knew what we were saying, and I played along.

A key memory I remember that includes all the little things I love is when I was ten and sick, all my siblings had to go feed the animals while I got to sit on the front porch swing reading Charlotte's Web with my mom. I could smell the flowers and the brewing coffee and hear Blaise laughing with Sweetheart like she told him the funniest joke (probably the interrupting cow one).

My dad was mowing the lawn so every time he was by our side of the house we would stop reading and look at each other like it was the most annoying thing in the world but I secretly loved it, and I think my mom did too. I live and breathe these little moments and if I could stay there and live in them forever, I think I would.

As I lay down in my childhood bedroom with my mom sleeping on the other side of the bed and reflect on another crazy life event that will probably be talked about in my autobiography if I ever live to write one.

I feel relieved, so relieved that I'm alive, how many times can I beat death? It makes me laugh even. It makes me question if the doctors know what they're talking about. If every time they've told me I wouldn't wake up, I do? But, I shouldn't be questioning their qualifications and professionalism, they're the reason I'm alive after all.

Well, I guess Harry's the reason I'm alive this time around. If he hadn't found me and then done CPR I'd probably be donezo. I hoped I thanked him already, I can't really remember with the anesthesia I was on. It's probably a good thing, I don't want to remember if I said how much I missed him or how pretty he is or possible kids names for our children. Yeah, I am glad I can't remember. I'm hoping Ejaz would have stepped in before I said anything embarrassing. My mother would just let me ramble on and on about how much I love Harry, although I'd like to think she'd stop me before I gave up all of my self-dignity.

I look around my room, there's my pink hello kitty electric guitar I got when I was ten, and right next to it lies my record player with my very diverse records. Joni Mitchell, The Smiths, Earth, Wind & Fire, Bruce Springsteen, Lana Del Rey, Taylor Swift, Avril Lavigne, and you absolutely can't forget my Best of Hannah Montana and The Cheetah Girls vinyl, I think they're my favorite of them all.

𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐨𝐧 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥, 𝐡.𝐬𝐭𝐲𝐥𝐞𝐬Where stories live. Discover now