"Get used to disappointment."
~~~
Harry felt something gnawing on his inside.
He didn't know what it was or how it happened, but it was there, eating him up.
Harry kind of thought, like deep in the back of his head, that it was guilt. But if it was guilt, that meant he was feeling something, and Harry didn't want to feel.
"I'm sorry," Harry muttered to himself as laid in his bed, trying to fall asleep.
Harry usually slept from four in the morning until around ten or eleven, sometimes even noon.
But the clock was showing Harry that it was 6:46 am and he's yet to fall asleep.
Something was calling him, something deep inside, urging him to cut himself, but he couldn't go that far.
Harry would be forbidden to dance until the cuts scarred over. It already took lots of effort hiding scars him when he was sixteen. It wouldn't be good to make new slices in his skin.
Harry needed a relief.
He dialed Zayn's number, knowing the lad's shift ended about thirty minutes ago and he may possibly be asleep.
"Hey, it's Zayn-"
"Zayn! I was wo-"
"You know what to do... Bye," the message finished, causing Harry to whine.
He dialed Ed's number now, falling back onto his bed again.
"Harry? I've got to get ready for work, what's up?"
"Oh. Nah, you can go," Harry muttered.
"Horny?" Ed asked and Harry sighed because Ed knew him so well.
"Yeah and in a bit of a catch. Want something to relieve me," Harry said, scratching his wrist out of habit.
"Sorry, mate. Did ya call Zayn?"
"Yeah, didn't pick up. He's off clock-"
"Look, I've really got to go. Come see me around one? I'll be home by then."
"I'll be there," Harry said far too quickly.
They hung up and Harry was finally able to sleep.
~~~
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
"You."
"Hm.... You who?"
"Yoo hoo, big summer blow out!"
Ed immediately opened the door, latching himself on to Harry, laughing and crying at the same time.
Harry stumbled back, not being the most coordinated person around, but managed to hold the smaller lad close.
"Harry?"
"Yeah."
"That was so lame."
"Everyone loves Frozen," Harry chuckled, pecking Ed's lips lightly.
"I hate Frozen. And so do you."
Harry sighed, remembering the stack of Disney movies in Louis's movie rack that hung on the wall. Anyone could see all of Louis's movie and he was proud of all the Disney movies he owned.
It was rather cute. Louis was cute.
"Harry?"
"Hm?"
"Wanna come in?" Ed asked, batting his eyelashes over his pretty, sea green eyes. All Harry could thing about was a grey-blue color and ex was leaning in, kissing Ed as he pushed the ginger into the apartment, kicking the door closed behind him.
It was quick and rather sloppy and Harry was a little off beside he couldn't taste the odd flavor of fresh lipstick or grip curb hips and Ed didn't have to stand on his toes on order to reach Harry's lips.
They moved to Ed's bed, Harry climbing over Ed's only slightly smaller figure, trying to push back his thoughts because Ed was always there for him.
If Harry had to give his trust to anyone, it would be Ed.
But Harry couldn't help himself.
There weren't any panties under Ed's skinnies and Ed's shirt smelled of cologne and not perfume and his lips weren't as plump and his hands were calloused from playing guitar. The blankets weren't royal purple, they were brown and the too looked like a guy's instead of a girl's and Harry found himself pulling away.
Ed started up at him, tracing a pale finger along his jaw. "Harry?"
His voice wasn't high and it wasn't ringing in Harry's ears. Harry's heart wasn't beating as fast as it usually did.
What was going on?
"Harry, what's wrong?"
"I can't," Harry breathed, pulling away.
"What? Why?" Ed asked, narrowing his eyes.
"It doesn't feel right."
"Don't play with my feelings, Harry," Ed spoke coldly.
Harry blinked, feeling guilty all of a sudden.
Fuck Louis for making him care.
Screw that.
Harry didn't care about hurting Ed's feelings. He didn't are about hurting Louis's feelings.
"Fuck it," Harry growled, bending down and kissing Ed again. He was just too hard to resist.
Besides- Harry did the punishing. And Louis couldn't do anything about it.
~~~
Naughty Harry.
I posted a new story called The Gay Project (:
Read if you want to, I'm excite to write it!!!
QOTC: why can Harry turn down Zayn but not Ed?
(Bc he's sexy. Not rly but)
PQOTC:
What clothing store do you shop at the most?
MA: rue 21
