Pretty Punk Cherry

46 ⭑ Starring Role.

"You're hard to hug, tough to talk to..."
♫ Starring Role by Cherry Bomb (Marina and the Diamonds.)

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When I was eight years old, I got my heart broken by a girl named Mira Burton.

We were on the playground, right next to the swing set and I asked her to be my girlfriend without a single care in the world. With boogers in my nose and untied laces that tripped me and everyone around me, I stood right in front of her and said, "May I be your boyfriend, please?" Holding out a picked flower I'd found by a bush and the Twinkie snack cake from my lunch box in offering.

I had no fear of rejection, no reason to be afraid of what would happen if she said no. I just knew that I thought she was the prettiest girl I'd ever seen and that if she said yes, we got to hold hands.

It was that simple. I thought it was that easy to be in love.

So, when she said no? Well, I fell into the deepest depression a child my age could. I spent the rest of the day at school silent and as I walked home to see my mom, I cried my eyes out.

But rather than making it to her and begging for comfort... I met a nine year old mop-headed boy.

Niko.

I was walking by myself one moment and the next, he was running to catch up to me and offering me the other half of his candy bar to cheer me up.

He asked me my name and why I was sad, and--I told him that Mira Burton was a girl I loved who squashed my heart like a bug.

He told me girls had cooties and he held my hand instead.

It was over, just like that. We ran back to my house laughing and when we got down to my basement to hangout, he showed me, for the first time, real rock music.

He played me David Bowie.

And that was it. I was hooked from then on to everything and anything rock related. Music became the most comforting escape in the world because I could have the worst day ever and listen to one song by Janis Joplin and suddenly be alright.

Then, when I got into playing drums, music not only became my escape but my stress reliever. It became the one thing I was good at and the only thing I wanted to do in life, other than be a dad.

Yet, as I sat at my kit in the corner of my room, I couldn't feel anything.

There was no joy. There was no inspiration. There was no escaping.

I didn't wanna get mad or pound out a song until my sticks snapped.

I wanted to be with the girl I was obsessed with.

The girl I liked. Maybe... loved.

But, I didn't get to be because I ruined it. I was finally changing when Cherry and I first ventured to New York and while I was scared of being so open, I was... open to the idea. Overnight, she became my favorite person and she was so honest with me all the time that I wanted to try to be that way for her.