80s Band Imagines

💙Izzy #9- Nothing's Changed

Angst

🎸

Izzy had been different ever since the boys had gotten back from tour. All he does is sit in his in-home studio and write songs. He even sleeps there some nights, leaving me all alone all day. It's Saturday today, which means I don't have to go to work. Izzy hates that I work, but I like my little shifts at the library, and they pay better than you might think. 

"Iz?"
I called from the hallway outside the locked studio door.

"Hm?"
He grunted, seemingly annoyed.

"I- um- I made dinner. I brought some up. It's your favorite."

"Not hungry."

"Izzy, you haven't eaten since you've gotten back from tour, at least not while I'm home."
I sighed, irritated that he won't open up.

"I'm not hungry."
He said again.

"Izzy Stradlin, I'm not leaving until you open this door."

Silence. 

With a heavy heart and tears brimming in my eyes, I trudged back downstairs. I covered the plate and threw it in the fridge, angrily wiping my tears. I stomped to the front and grabbed my shoes.
I laced them up and grabbed my jacket off the rack.

"Where are you going?"
Izzy asked.

"Out."
I deadpanned, opening the front door.

"Don't leave,"
Izzy said. Quietly. Almost timid.

"You don't want me here. I'm going out."
I said, not looking at him.

"Will you stay? I haven't gotten to talk to you."
He said, getting closer.

"That's not my fault, is it?"
I snapped.

"Baby-"
He said, trying to grasp me.

"No!
I flinched away, rouge tears slipping down my face.

"June-bug, baby. What's the matter?"
He asked, pulling away from me, confused at my behavior.

"Don't touch me. You haven't talked or touched or wanted me around! You didn't kiss me when you got home, and you haven't slept in our bed since you left! If you don't want me and I'm not enough, just tell me!"
I yelled, my knees giving out from underneath me, causing me to fall on the cold tile by the door.

I cried into my hands, and Izzy rushed to my side, kneeling next to me and bringing me into his chest.

"I love you so much, Sweetheart."
He whispered into my ear.

"St-stop ly-ing to m-e."
I sobbed, weakly pushing against Izzy.

"M'not lying to you, baby. Love you so much."

"Th-en why a-are you ig-nori-ng me?"

"M'sorry, Sweetheart. I'm such a dick."
Izzy says, kissing from my neck up to my cheeks.

"I mis-s y-you."
I cried into his chest, clenching his shirt in my hands

"C'mon baby. Let's go lay down. Hm? Wanna lay down?"
He asked.

I nodded, and Izzy carried me upstairs. When we got upstairs, he grabbed a pair of his sweats and one of his shirts and handed them to me before going to the bathroom to change. I quickly undressed and put his clothes on, and got under the covers of my bed, facing away from the bathroom door. I heard the door open and felt Izzy climb into bed with me, wrapping his arms around my front.

"Get some sleep, baby."
Izzy whispered.

"Why don't you love me like before?"
I asked, no emotion evident in my voice.

"I love you, Sweetheart, you know that."
He sighed.

"Not like you used to. You used to love coming home and wanted to spend every second you were here with me. Doing anything and everything. And now you can't look at me. And, and, I need to know if you love me. Because if not, we can leave."

"We?"

"We, Izzy. I'm pregnant. I found out right after you left for the last leg of the tour. I'm three months, today."
I told him, willing the tears not to leak from my eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me, baby?"

"When, Izzy? Did you want me to stand outside the studio door and yell at you through the door only to be met with an 'okay' or silence?"
I asked, my tear ducts betraying me and the tears cascading like a waterfall down my face.

"Fuck. Sweetheart, I'm so sorry. I just. I came home and felt empty. Like, since I wasn't on stage, or with the guys, I had nothing to do. Like I had nothing good to do with myself."

"I wish you would have just told me, baby. Instead of hiding from me. You don't know how much that hurt me."
I said, flipping over to be face-to-face with him.

"I know, Sweetheart. I just thought maybe I would figure it out. that writing would take my mind off of the feeling, but it turns out I can't write for shit by myself."
He chuckled lightly.

"Just talk to me, baby, please. K?"
I asked, to which he nodded in return.

Izzy kissed me gently and brought me closer to him, and wrapped us together.

"Is it a boy or a girl?"
He questioned softly.

"A boy."
I responded. 

"We're having a boy?"
He asked, tears beginning to prick his eyes.

"Yeah, baby, a boy."
I smiled from ear to ear.

"God, I love you so much."
Izzy sighed before connecting our lips again.

"C'mon, we'll talk more in the morning. Sleep now, babe."
I said once we pulled away.

Izzy nodded, and I cuddled back into him before drifting off into sleep, knowing nothing's changed.