till forever falls apart

the future's hands

it's almost time.

When Natasha and Anya get back with the dogs, Wanda's in the kitchen and putting groceries away.

"Where'd you guys go?" she asks, watching as Anya kicks off her shoes and not looking at Natasha for too long.

"Took the dogs for a walk," Natasha replies, letting Fanny and Lucky off of their leashes, "Lena's staying another night at the hospital, they're going to do her amputation tomorrow."

"Oh," Wanda nods, "how's she feeling about that?"

"I'm going to my room," Anya announces, sending them both a quick smile before disappearing down the hall with Fanny on her heels.

"She's okay," Natasha puts the leashes on the (mostly unused) dining room table, "Kate's got her."

Wanda hums, putting away a fresh loaf of bread and telling Natasha to unload one of the other full bags before asking, "Can we talk about last night?"

"Yeah," Natasha tenses, not sure how ready she is for this conversation. She doesn't really feel anymore prepared for it than she did this morning.

"Okay," Wanda leans back against the sink as Natasha unloads the last bag, "do you want to talk first or should I?"

"You can talk first," Natasha responds, unloading the bag of mostly fruits and vegetables.

"Alright," Wanda weaves her fingers together, taking a second before speaking. "I know what I said about kids last night was sudden. When we initially moved here, we knew it was going to be temporary and I'm glad that we're revisiting that conversation."

Natasha nods, putting away the strawberries before closing the fridge door and folding the empty bag up.

"That doesn't change the fact that I want more kids, though," Wanda sighs, eyes on the ceiling as she pieces together her words, "I grew up a twin, Pietro was my best friend until he died and I still think about him every day. I want Anya to have someone like that."

Natasha puts the bag with the rest of the bags, "May I?"

Wanda nods.

"If we had a kid right now, they'd be an infant while Anya would be sixteen. And maybe they'd be close while the kid's a toddler, but Anya's going to go to school next year and probably college after that. She's going to be off living her life while for the next sixteen years after, we have a kid to raise," Natasha tries, "and then we're in the same predicament of that kid being alone."

Natasha fusses with her fingers, trying to word everything carefully, "I feel like it's not just one more kid. I think if we're having another kid, we'll end up having two more kids. And that's a lot. A lot to take on, a lot to manage, a huge lifestyle change."

"Then we adopt," Wanda reasons, "I don't know if I can actually get pregnant, anyway."

"What if you find a way to get your kids, though?" Natasha asks, "what if we adopt another kid, maybe two, whatever, and then you figure out that Billy and Tommy are somewhere where you could also get them back? Then we have four kids."

"Then we have four kids," Wanda replies, "like you said, though, Anya's probably going to be out of the house soon."

"Kids aren't just something that go away when they turn eighteen, though, Wanda," Natasha retorts, "they're with you forever. And how young would we adopt? It just feels like... it feels like a lot right now."

"Then we wait a couple of years," Wanda responds, "this doesn't all have to happen tomorrow, Nat."

"I'm not saying it does," Natasha says, "It's just... I'm forty, Wanda. Most women my age can't get pregnant and hold a pregnancy. And it's not worth it to me to have an infant, I'll be almost sixty when they graduate and I don't want to miss their wedding because I was so old and died before they could ever get married."