VIII ~ Breaking the Silence

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{You Make it Real - James Morrison}

...There's so much craziness surrounding me, there's so much going on, it gets hard to breathe, you make it real for me...

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May 26th

The cabin door swung shut behind me as I made my return home, leaving Benjamin at his car as we went our separate ways, my mind distracted with the night's plans with Elliot in my mind. Benjamin had offered to walk me home to the cabin, but I had politely declined. I didn't need to get my parents hopes up more than they already were. 

        "How was the date with lover boy?" Bodhi's voice permeated my senses. 

He was sprawled across the sofa, watching a movie on the flatscreen, while Cady sat near him, her eyes glued to the screen. 

    "Don't ask," I sighed, before composing myself, my eyes searching around the cabin. "Where's Mom and Dad?"

    "With Tim and Clara. Where else?" Cady perked up, rolling her eyes at Mom and Dad's obsession, her eyes still stuck on the TV. 

   "They're probably selling their souls as we speak," Bodhi pinched the bridge of his nose in distaste, his usual sarcastic tone evident in every syllable of his words. 

     I shrugged off my cardigan from my shoulders and grabbed a glass of water before taking a seat next to Bodhi. I tried to tune into the movie, but I feared I was too far detached, distracted as my eyes checked the clock at the window every few minutes. My hands fidgeting with the rings on my fingers, waiting for it to be late enough to make my excuses and venture off to find Elliot. The promise of spending time with him was almost too much to handle, willing the arthritic hands of the clock to move faster as I glared at its achingly slow movements. 

     The movie soon finished and Cady skulked off to bed without a word that Bodhi sat upright, his eyes narrowing at me as he took sight of me. 

    "So are you going to tell me why you keep staring at the clock like it's been giving you an attitude?" Bodhi turned to face me, shifting his entire body on the sofa as his question caught me off guard.

    "No reason," I lied. 

     I kept my eyes on the TV, pretending to be engrossed in the credits rolling on the TV. 

    "C'mon, it's me you're talking to," he whined, attempting to coax the truth from me. 

    "I'm just going to meet someone," I teased him with a vague reply.

      Bodhi was the only member of my family I actually trusted. He had been my confidante for years. There was so much of me that was fit to burst, to tell him everything that was rattling around my brain the way I always used to. But somehow, there was a silent wall put up between us over the past few years since he went off to college. Time and distance have a funny way of stealing that sense of ease. 

    "Who is it? And don't feed me that crap about meeting the Beaumont kid. You came home from a date with him not two hours ago, and trust me; you looked anything but flushed."

  "No one," I replied. 

      I sighed, listening to Bodhi's brotherly frustrations. He whined and pressed, pleading for answers. I remained stoic and silent, hoping he would stop. But my silent only intensified his need to take hold of the information I possessed. 

  "C'mon who are you going to meet? I mean, you don't know many people, especially not around here... It's not that entertainment employee is it?" 

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