cardigan, a. butler

ninety-eight

ninety-eight, unrequited love

"starting with the first question, how did you create the idea of harry's house?" zane asked curiously.

"i actually got the idea last summer when i visited elsie in new york and she was mockingly saying to me, 'i can't wait to go to harry's house' because she had never been to my place in la and from there it kind of sat in my brain for months before i decided to name my album harry's house."

"how different is harry's house from your previous albums?"

"i feel like with this album, it was more me than any of my albums that i created. it's like stepping into my home and getting to know the real me and not the one everyone perceives me to be on the internet."

"and you met elsie during the early days of one direction, correct?"

"yeah, it's all a bit of a blur how we all managed to cross paths with her at that time but we've never once took it for granted because there is nobody else on earth that is quite like her."

"how did you approach elsie with collaborating on matilda and little freak?"

"i honestly don't remember it quite well but i knew from the moment i named it harry's house, i wanted her to be a part of it. i feel most at home when we're together and she just brings me this sort of comfort that no one else has and i thought it'd be special for her to be on this album." harry explained with a smile of admiration for elsie.

"in your past albums and in this one, you write songs about a specific person. can you say that this person is your muse for your music?"

"yeah, definitely. this person has been a big part of my life for such a long time and they're the reason i am who i am today." harry explained softly.

"are we able to know who inspires you to write amazing songs?" zane asked shyly.

harry simply chuckled softly before nodding.

"most of my songs that i wrote we're about elsie." harry confessed sheepishly.

"is there like a whole explanation as to why or?" zane asked.

"yeah, um, throughout my days with one direction, i've always seen elsie as a best friend, nothing more since i am three years older than her, i have this sort of need to be protective of her.

but once i was around 23 or 24, i didn't see elsie in the same way anymore. she had grown up beautifully and i started seeing her as a woman instead of a girl.

and during this time, she was dating luke and i could tell she was happy in the relationship and i couldn't be selfish, so i kept my feelings to myself.

and as time passed, i never stopped having these feelings for her and when she had told me that she and luke had broken up, my feelings for her grew.

i, of course, never told her and i just poured my feelings into my music as a way to tell her that i was in love with her without actually telling her.

i think we were all in love with her at the same time, we just never told her because we cared more about our friendship with her than anything else in the world.

it would devastate not only me but everyone else if we had ruined our friendship.

she was and still is a very special person to all of us. she's like a breath of fresh air and she's like the sunshine after a big storm.

she is just so positive and determined and i think that's why we all fell for her. she made our days better." harry confessed with a smile.

"you wrote all your songs about elsie?"

"majority of them are about her. i don't want to say all of them are about her because then i'd seem like a love struck idiot but yeah, most of my songs were and still are about her." harry nodded.

"what songs on the album are about elsie, if i may ask?"

"matilda, little freak, and love of my life." harry smiled.

"can you explain why you wrote these songs for her?"

"i wrote matilda about her because during the last bit of her relationship with luke, it went sour and i could see she was miserable and it absolutely killed me to see her so upset about it and now she's grown into this beautiful, strong person that i admire.

little freak is about me loving her and thinking about her no matter who she was with. i couldn't help the feelings i felt for her while she was in a relationship and i didn't care who she was with, as long as she was happy. that's all i ever wanted for her.

love of my life is about me realizing that i had lost her and i didn't realize i did until it was already too late. i didn't want to lose her and yet somehow i managed to.

all three songs are very special to me and express my past feelings for her and showcases how i'll always have a very special in my heart, no matter how much time has passed."

"does she know about the feelings you had for her?" zane asked.

"no, she doesn't. even after i lost my romantic feelings for her, i didn't tell her because deep down i didn't want her to know that i loved her, as selfish as that is, i wanted to keep it a secret but it looks like it won't be a secret anymore." harry remarked.

"looking back at your days in one direction, did you think you'd be where you are now?" zane asked:

"i never thought in a million years that i'd be doing a solo career without the boys, if i'm being honest. i always thought that we'd be doing this together but i honestly think us not being in the band together has really changed our perspective on life and made us really cherish our time together."

"thank you for coming on and letting us in on the idea of harry's house."

"thank you for having me!" harry smiled.

"harry's house is out now on all platforms!"

BELLA'S CORNER

tell me why i wrote this entire chapter at work LMAOOO

but yeah, i'm regretting not making them a thing 💔

they would've been so perfect together 🥹

is it too late to make this a harry styles fanfic? 😭