VIRTUOSO - A MYG Story

KEY CHANGE

YOONGI

"Did your mother ever talk to you about what happened to you?"

The therapist seemed kind, even at that first visit. Faye had helped me find someone who dealt with childhood trauma specifically, so I felt better about meeting her than I would have with most other professionals.

"No."

I answered honestly.

"How about your dad?"

"No."

"Has anyone ever told you that what happened to you as a child was wrong, Yoongi?"

I glanced up from my hands in my lap and made eye contact with the woman who was still a stranger to me.

"Faye."

The therapist smiled warmly, seemingly satisfied that I wasn't entirely lost.

"And do you believe her? That what happened to you was wrong and should have never happened to you?"

I pursed my lips, disgusted at having to face any of this, especially so unexpectedly, but it wasn't difficult to answer. Of course I believed her.

"Yes."

I watched her sliding her finger all over her tablet screen for the next few minutes, wondering what crazy diagnosis she'd probably coming up with for me. It felt like a sentence. I felt like I had been called to the principal's office in the strangest way.

I felt shame. This stranger now knew one of my darkest secrets. Something I myself didn't remember just days ago. I didn't know how she had painted me in her professional mind. She probably only wanted my money after all...

I was skeptical. How could this new person believe she could figure me out? What did she possibly know that I didn't already know about myself?

My negative thoughts screeched to a halt when she looked up from her screen with a soft smile.

"Tell me about the last time you had a great day."

"Faye took me to a vineyard this weekend," I grinned ear to ear unwillingly. It came naturally. I was still feeling almost high from the unexpected weekend getaway she had planned.

"Did you feel joy?"

That's an odd question.

Joy. Why not happiness?

"Yes. I was happy. It was a great weekend."

"Not happiness, Yoongi. Joy."

I thought for a long time, brushing my fingers back and forth across my lower lip in deep contemplation. I had no idea how to approach such a question.

"Yes," I smiled. It almost hurt my cheeks. "Joy. Faye brings me joy."

"And music?" she asked.

Another challenging question.

She's good.

"It didn't for a long time."

"But does music bring you joy now?"

"When Faye joined the band, she brought my passion back."

"Would you say she also awakened another side of you?"