Without them knowing

◎Chapter 2◎

It always went like this. He would come up to my room after he was sure everyone else was asleep. Even after he had shared his bed with other women he would still come up to my room. Sometimes he didn't even to shower before coming. He would reek of sex with other girls and still hold me.

I wondered if he did that on purpose? If he did that just so he could torture me.

The first time he did that was the same day he discovered we were mates. He just told me he accepted me and before I knew it I felt a piercing pain shoot through my heart. I was cooking dinner at that time. Because of the pain I had dropped a plate. Making it shatter all over the floor. One of my pack mates had then pushed me into the pieces of glass. Screaming at me how worthless I was, how I did nothing right. I still had a few scars to prove it.

And I guess I then realized that my mate would never really see me as his mate. I was just the worthless omega. But I never really understood why he didn't just reject me. I was so angry. Did he really hate me that much that he would do something this cruel?

I made the mistake of asking him that that night. He had just come up to my room for the first time. His shirt half unbuttoned, showing his perfectly tanned skin. His brown curls were messy, as if he had just come out of bed. Much to my horrible realization he really had just come out of bed. I could smell Bonnie on him.

"Alpha, what are you doing here?" I asked, bowing my head.

He didn't answer me and walked up to me. He just smashed his lips on mine and hugged me tight to him.

"I'm so sorry, Parker," said and looked my in the eyes. That was the first time he said my name. My heart fluttered as those words left his lips and I melted. All my anger vanishing. I could see he meant it. He really was sorry.

So I decided to ask him. "Why did you sleep with Bonnie right after you accepted me? Did you change your mind?" I looked his straight in the eye while asking.

He froze and his eyes hardend. "No, I did not change my mind. You are mine! And I am your Alpha! You wil speak to me with respect!"

I bowed down my head in submission instantly. I really didn't want to get another beating when my arms and hands were still hurting from the cuts.

Elijah sighed and gently laid us down on the bed.

"You're my mate," he said, planting little kisses from mouth to my collarbone. "You will always be my mate."

That was the moment I realized I loved him. Was I a masochist for loving someone who had hurt me many times? Well then, I guess I was. I fell asleep in his arms. His arms felt like my own personal heaven.

The following morning my heart broke when I saw that he wasn't next to me anymore. His scent was very faint so I knew he had been gone for an hour or so.

It broke every morning a little further when I never saw him laying next to me. After always seeing him with other girls I didn't know how much more I could take until I broke.

Yelling broke me away from my thoughts and I turned around to look what was wrong. My sponge, that I was cleaning the floor with, still in my hand.

Elijah came storming down the stairs. His father hot on his heels. "What do you mean you won't mate with Bonnie? She is the perfect match for you! You're almost twenty and haven't even mated yet!" Derek, the Alpha had practically steam coming out of his ears.

"I don't wan't that slut as a mate!" yelled Elijah back.

"You will find a mate before your twenty'st birthday or I will not give you the Alpha title!" threatened his father, leaving no room for argument.

"I don't even want a f*cking mate!"

I froze and dropped the sponge.

Derek and Elijah both snapped their heads in my directing. As if only now realizing they were not alone.

Well, I guess I was really invisible.

For a moment I thought I saw regret in my mates eyes, before they hardend and he stormed out of the house. Slamming the door behind him.

The Alpha sighed. "Stubborn idiot," he mumbled, looking at the door. Then he turned back to look at me. "What are you looking at slave," he sneered. "Get back to work you piece of sh*t." He was a bit pissy because his mate way away for her business.

I bowed and did as he said. But my thoughts were far away.

Why did he say that?

I sighed and continued scrubbing the floor. I am just the omega, I reminded myself, I can't expect him to just claim me. That would mean trowing away his title. And he wouldn't do that. I am just the omega.

After I finished cleaning I went to the kitchen and quickly made lunch. Most of the teenagers were in school so I only had to make food for 400 people. After three hours I was finally done and quickly served everyone. The adults of the pack didn't treat me as bad as the teenagers. They would scowl in my direction mostly but thats it. Except if I screwed up. Then I would get punished.

Elijah didn't show up for dinner and I was getting worried. Of course, he and his dad fought often but normally he didn't stay away for this long.

I bit my lip as I stared worriedly at my plate. I didn't get much to eat so normally I wouldn't hesitate to stuff it down my throat. But something just didn't sit well with me. Somehow I felt angry and frustrated. But those weren't my feelings. They were his. My mates.

I shoved the plate away an leaned against the cupboard.

I hoped he was allright. Right then I felt another piercing pain go trough my heart and I gasped, clutching my chest.

He was having sex with someone else again. Tears gathered behind my eyes and I slid down to the floor. I closed my eyes and tried to block out the feeling.

Did he really enjoy torturing me this much?

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