S.E.A.L

~Fear of Flying~

So tonight is the date with Brook's homeboy. Lord knows I trust my sister but she ain't got the best taste in men, trust me i know anyway a story for a different day. I just hope to god she ain't set me up with no broke down looking nigga.  I was getting ready while Brook and Charli were in the living room watching tv. I wasn't trying to overdo it so I put on something cute but also showed just a little bit of skin.  What gotta keep the guy interested somehow?  So how do I look I said walking into the living room. Damn Jay I didn't know you could clean up that well. Brook said looking me over. Whatever Brook, how do I look Charli? You look pretty Gigi. Thank you baby, I said hugging him. He should be here any minute. You didn't even tell me his name. His name is Michael, he's about 6'2, light skinned, with bluish green eyes. Where you find him at? We go to the same gym. He has a job right? Really Jay? Of course he has a job. I am just make sure cause you know...say it I want you to say it. Nevermind! That's what i thought! Well Charli needs to be in bed by 9 and...Jay I think I can take care of my own nephew, I know his bed time.  I am sorry Brook, it's just that...I know it's okay. You need to start taking care of yourself, instead of everyone else all the time.

Charli starts screaming like a mad person...Look Gigi Titi Li, Mimi (this is what he calls T, don't know why but he does), and RoRo are on the TV. Brook grabbed the remote and tried to turn it off real quick before I could see it. It's cool Brook leave it on. You sure? I am positive.  Gigi, I miss them. I know baby, you can see them when we go back in a few weeks, okay.  Yay, and then he went back to playing with his toys.  You finally healing I see. Little by little every day, I said slightly smiling.  Then there was a knock on the door. He's here; I'll get the door for you. Thanks Brook, I am gonna grab my purse. I went to me and Charli's room to grab my purse. Before leaving the room I took off the necklace that Ti had sent back to me and took the pic of the 4 of us that I'd been carrying around for months on end. I put the picture and the necklace in the drawer and took out a piece of paper to write down a number, before going back into the living room. * I haven't taken the necklace off since the day I realized Ti gave it back. She replaced the picture with a pic of the 4 us. And this time it was engraved on the back with "S.E.A.L".* I can't lie I miss them, but this is my new normal.

I walked back to the living room to see this fine ass looking man talking to Brook. Good gawd that man is gorgeous.  Like I'd pop out five his light skin bluish green eyed babies right this minute. Okay, he wasn't that fine, but he wasn't on the bad side either.  I mean he was tall, light skinned, muscular build, with colored eye he was just my type.

Oh Michael this is my sister Jay'mee. Jay'mee this is Michael. Hello. I said staring into his light green eyes. Hi, you look beautiful. Thanks! So shall we get going? Sure! I turned around to give Charli a hug and kiss. Be good for Auntie Brook okay baby. I will Gigi. Brook here let him call this person before he goes to bed. Who is it? I gave her a look. Oh okay, she said folding the piece of paper up and putting it in her pocket. Have fun she said waving as we left her apartment. We got down stairs and he opened the door for me to get in his car. We drove for like 15 minutes before getting to this nice little Italian restaurant. Again he opened the door for me to get out the car and for me to enter the restaurant. Thank you don't have to keep doing that I said as we sat at the table. It's no problem that how a beautiful lady like you should be treated. I blushed a little (Yes black people do blush). As the evening went on, Michael was a complete gentlemen and he was really taking interest in me. And did I mention the man was fine as all get out. I had to keep myself from taking him down on the table, that's a story for a different though.  We were driving back to Brook's place and we were just making small talk.

So for real you worked with Babyface? Worked is past tense, I work with Babyface and a lot of other people for that matter. So then that means you know TLC. There it was the one subject that I didn't want to talk about at all. Yeah, I know them. How is it working with them? Are they really like that in real life.  Uh... yeah they are. Thank god we were back at the apartment. So I had a nice time with you tonight. He said. I had a nice time with you too. Can I see you again? I think I can arrange that. I said smiling. Then he leaned in to kiss me. I stopped him and whispered in his ear, "I don't kiss on the first date, but if you're lucky maybe on the second", then I got out the car leaving him there drooling.

When I got up stairs Brook was on the couch eating ice cream with Charli layed out in her lap. So how was it, she said perking up. It was good, he's a sweetheart. Where'd yall go? This little Italian restaurant on 15th and Elm, it was real nice. You gonna see him again? Maybe, I said picking Charli up and taking him to the room to put him in bed. Gigi! He said in his sleepy little kid voice. Yeah baby. Guess who I talked to. Who'd you talk to? Mimi! You did, what did she say? She said she misses me and she told me to tell you something. And what's that I said tucking him in. She said to tell you that she loves and misses you too. I just looked at him as he fell back asleep. No matter where I go I can't get away from them. I kissed his cheek and went back out to the living room. He talked to her? Yeah he did for like 30 mins. Did you talk to her? Jay I am not trying to be in the middle yalls mess, she's my friend too. Brook please. Fine Jay, I did talk to her. She told me tell you that she still loves you and to please call her cause she needed to talk to you. What could she possibly have to tell me? Brook looked away like she knew something. You know something you aren't sharing Brook? I can't Jay, she needs to tell you. Tell me what? Just call her, she said going to her room.

I grabbed Brook's phone off the counter and dialed Ti's number. After a few rings she answered. So you actually called me back? Yeah, I was told you had something you needed to tell me. I do, but I want to do it in person. Where you at? I am in Chicago with Brook. What's so important you can't tell me over the phone? I...I am...T just spit it out. I am pregnant Jay! What does that have to do with me? Ain't that what married women are supposed to do, have babies with their husbands? She didn't say anything. I am telling you because I love you and still value your opinion in my life and I need you Jay.  Listen Ti, my opinion stopped counting when you left me for Mack and it really stopped mattering when you married him 3 days after my birthday. So I don't really understand how this news involves me. Jay please? Please what Ti? What do you want me to do? You left I didn't and now you want me to care? Baby please I am trying... No Ti... you know what I am not arguing with you. Just do me a favor and just forget about me. Just forget about everything we had. We were both crying by this time. Jay I am not gonna do that. I am never gonna do that, I love you too much to do that. Ti please just... I gotta go. Don't hang up Jay, was the last thing I heard before I hung up on her. I cried myself to sleep that night. How was I supposed to get over them when everywhere I turn?

A month later... Michael and I saw each other a few more times before I left to go back home. He's a cool guy and all but it's still too early to say that we'd ever have anything outside of a friendship.  Charlie and I came back to Atlanta, so we could get the girls from Li. Yeah I saw her in person cause she insisted that I come get the girls when she was there. Actually her words were "If i don't see yo ass in person you ain't getting them", so yeah you know how that goes. We talked about how we would handle the girls with the tours, her trips to work on her solo album, and Tionne's and Ro's schedules as well . Before I left she made it a point to corner me and kiss me. And when I say corner I do mean she literally had me in a corner with my hands pinned above my head. I almost gave in completely until the kids came running in. I know she felt that I was about to given in cause when we pulled away she told me "that was long overdue and I wish could take you right now".  Oh how I desperately wanted her to strip me down and make me scream her name for hours. I couldn't now that would set me back severely and I made so much progress. Before I left she told me she loves me and that she would call and check in on the girls. I finally saw Ro after 2 and half years. We didn't say much just a smile and kept it moving. She had her little boy with her. He's adorable and looks just like Ro.  Ti on the other hand calls me literally every week like clockwork, regardless of if I pick up or not she calls. I felt bad about the way I treated her so every know and then I send her flowers. I never put a name on them, but she knows who they are from. I know this cause she will send the flowers to me the next week with a note that simply says "I love you". I guess you can say this is our new normal, Co-parenting, friends, who just casually acknowledge each other. 

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Looks like they are all moving on and are some what happy. Look at Ti and Jay being all sweet on the sly. Maybe they all just need some time away from each other to truly get it together.