silent

40

• LORENZO •

When we get home, Amalia goes straight to her room without talking to anyone, and doesn't answer Elijah when he asks if everything went okay.

Half an hour later, Xander walks through the door with one McDonalds bag and a chocolate milkshake. None of my sons went up to her when I told them what the doctor said to us, but I can tell they all want to. They just don't think she wants them to.

He walks upstairs tentatively, and I follow him. He knocks at the door, but there's no sound on the other side.

"Amalia." Xander says, loud enough for his little sister to be able to hear. "Can we come in?"

No answer.

I open the door. Amalia is curled up under her blankets, staring at the wall. My heart breaks all over again when I see the fresh tear marks on her face.

     "Amalia." I whisper. She glances at me. "Are you okay, baby?"

She doesn't reply. I walk over to her and crouch beside the bed as Xander follows me nervously. She looks at me again, and her face is completely empty.

My little girl.

"Xander got you some food." I tell her quietly. She looks over at him, then away. Then, slowly, she turns on her other side, the opposite direction from us. I stand and look at her. Her eyes are closed, but I know she's not asleep. She wants us to go away.

     I lean down and kiss her cheek. "I'll come check on you in a little bit." I tell her quietly. She keeps her eyes closed, but I see them twitching. I let out a small breath and walk out. Xander follows me.

•

Amalia doesn't come out of her room for the rest of the day, but when I leave food at her bedside table and leave, it's all gone when I return.

     At around ten o'clock, I walk into her room to say goodnight, only to discover that she's already sleeping, her breaths slow and even. I frown as I sit next to her and set my hand on her shoulder, rubbing the pad of my thumb in circles there. I don't mean to wake her up, but a few moments later her eyes peel open and she looks at me, eyes glassy.

     "Hi, baby. Are you feeling okay?" I ask her. She nods, barely, but I smile anyway. "That's good. Are you hungry? I can make you something else."

She shakes her head.

     "Do you want anything else?" I ask. She shakes her head again, but then drapes her arm over my leg and snuggles into my thigh. She seems to fall back asleep, so I stay there, unsure of what else to do. I lean back on her headboard and run my fingers through her hair.

     After a few minutes, she stirs again and scoots up, laying her head on my chest and letting out a content little breath. I smile and kiss her forehead before wrapping her blanket tighter around her. I fall asleep like that—my back arched so she can be comfortable and my leg buzzing with pins and needles.

• XANDER •

"What's wrong with you today?" Maddie asks me. "Normally you're more fun."