The body in the mirror

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This has some gender dysphoria but much more "I want to be androgynous" way so of that makes you uncomfortable id skip this chapter


California looked in the mirror, to find a tall, skinny guy staring back at him.

California didn't like his body. Though he didn't hate it. Yeah he wished it were more feminine, but in a a masculine way, though he could live with how he looked. He never understood the difference between men and woman's clothing sections clothes don't have genders. So why did everyone seem to accept this? Why was it so hard to fit into a category that everyone seemed to follow? He remembered the few times he'd been confused for a girl, and how it felt so nice to just have someone acknowledge him as not fitting into how he's "suppose to look", than he remembered the others around him correcting the person. Than he remembered the time someone had to struggle before using a pronoun in a sentando for him, before asking if he was a guy or a girl. It felt amazing. He didn't understand why when people used a variety of mix and matched words made him feel an overwhelming euphoria. He just knew that gender wasn't as simple as boy or girl. So, he did some digging.

It was always so complicated to find information on stuff that wasn't the status quo, like no one wanted him to know. Though eventually he found something, a Mesopotamian god that didn't seem to fit into the confines of male or female. He knew that this was considered wrong, as your either a boy or girl in the worlds eyes, but he liked it. The idea of being both or neither was entertained in his mind for much longer than it would for a person who was confident in their binary.

Maybe she was a boy girl who liked being called a he or a her. Though he couldn't tell anyone. People already thought she was weird cause he talked to much about stuff that interested her. Or couldn't sit still. It seemed to loose focus, or felt uncomfortable because of textures, sounds, and taste. So there was no way he could say a thing.

So she just has to be a boy girl or neither in his mind.

Sadly this was the closest she could get to a feminine-masculine body.

Then he walked away from the mirror.

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