Chapter 38

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A.N. The link to the song I have included does not relate to this chapter in any way btw. It's a song from Eurovision I have been obsessed with since Saturday which is pretty unusual as the songs on Eurovision are usually dreadful! Anyway it's so good so I thought I'd share it will all ye guys! Enjoy :)

Iver drove us back to Ethan's apartment. The journey in the car was deathly silent except for a few quiet sniffles from Ethan.

I sat in the back and held Ethan in my arms as I watched the heavens open up and raindrops slide down the tinted windows of the car. I could hear the thunder clapping overhead as we pulled up outside my brother's apartment.

"Come on Ethan, lets get you inside" I whispered to Ethan. He felt numb in my arms. If it wasn't for the light rising and falling of his chest I would have assumed that he was dead. The moonlight struck his face and illuminated the pale pallor of his skin. He was deathly white.

I opened the door and signalled for Iver to give me a hand with getting Ethan out of the car. Iver moved towards us and wrapped one of Ethan's arms around his shoulders while I did the same with his other arm. I had done this so many times before with Ethan that I was used to it, but that was when he was drunk. This was a completely different situation.

It was a struggle to get him up the seven flights of stairs as the lift was under maintenance but we managed, somehow. I flushed Ethan's keys out of his pocket and swung the front door open to reveal his rather immaculate apartment which was unusually tidy for a guy. We stumbled in through the doorway and made our way over to the couch.

"Ethan would you like some tea?" I asked after I had caught my breath. He didn't answer; he just stared at the coffee table in front of him, his gaze unwavering. I looked to Iver worryingly. I didn't know what to do.

"I'll put the kettle on" Iver said softly and grasped my shoulder as he passed. It was a surprisingly comforting gesture. I smiled gently at him and he returned it with a slight tweak of his upper lip. I turned back to Ethan and held his hands in mine.

Dark circles rested under his eyes and reminded me of the horrors he must be going through right now. I felt my jaw clench as I thought of that bastard who dared disown his only son because he was gay. I could feel my fist clench around Ethan's hand as I thought of how Id love to punch father until he was unconscious.

I could hear the clinking of metal against china as Iver swirled the sugar about in the mug with a spoon in the kitchen. The noise seemed to bring Ethan out of whatever dark recess his mind had retreated to. He offered me a watery smile. He looked so broken, not the fun loving Ethan I had known my whole life.

"I just want to forget" he whispered as a tear streamed down his face. "I just want to pretend this never happened." I pulled him into my arms and hugged him so tightly his circulation was probably cut off.

"It's okay Ethan, its okay" I sighed while he sobbed uncontrollably into my shoulder. The material was so wet it was beginning to stick to my skin. "Shush" I whispered as I rubbed his back as you would a child.

"I just want to go to bed" he mumbled through his tears. I slowly stood up and began to lead Ethan to his bedroom. I changed him into his pyjamas and then tucked him in. I leaned down and kissed him on the forehead, "I'll be back in a minute, I just need to say goodbye to Iver." By the time I'd pulled away he was already sound asleep.

I wandered back into the kitchen to see Iver with a mug of tea in his hand for me. It was just what I needed. I whispered my thanks and then cradled the mug in my hand. I blew some of the steam away before taking a soothing gulp.

Iver leaned beside me against the counter and then slowly wrapped an arm around my shoulders and brought me towards his chest. He was so warm. His natural scent surrounded me. I never wanted to move from this position, it was so relaxing.

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