Chapter twenty seven

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(JULIO POV )

It starts with a phone call.

One phone call for everything I have built to come tumbling down. For all the shit I have strived to achieve in the past three years to mean absolutely nothing.

I stare at mi madre from the kitchen table and narrow my eyes as she hums a spanish lullaby under her breath, a breathtaking smile on her face. It’s something she does when she’s happy about something.

But this time happiness wasn’t worth the humming.

Under any other circumstance I would be beyond happy to see her smiling like that again. Hell, I might have joined her. But when I think about who is causing her that smile, my hand tightens into a fist.

My father called yesterday telling my mother the good news. His court date has been moved up and the chances of him being released in the next two weeks is almost certain.

I should be excited and ecstatic that my father is coming up. A part of me is. A part of me is just waiting to see my my father again. A part of me hopes things might be different.

But that part is nothing but a molecule compared to the other feelings churning in my gut.

It will start off great, I know this. My mother will fall back in love, not that she was ever out of it, and he will sweep everyone off their feet. He will come back into all of our lives and there is no way I can stop him from hurting these people.

There is no way I can keep him from Jose, Marcia, or Louis. I can’t keep him from destroying these peoples lives like he did mine.

Because, he will. He will probably join back up with Pacho and anything dealing with him and his posse doesn’t end well. Pacho will welcome him back with open arms and the moment that happens, my father won’t be my father any more.

He will be nothing more but the scum I see on the street.

But why should I care? I know I shouldn’t. I should spit on the street that man walks on. But that little part I was talking about earlier won’t allow me such peace.

Thinking of Pacho doesn’t help at the moment. My suppose drug trade was next weekend and the faster is approached, the more I would stare out into space and wonder what I did wrong.

When did I turn into the man I am currently living as? I lived my whole life vowing not to become my father and now everything around me is bringing me down the road I have tried to avoid at all costs.

This is the moment my father would be proud of.

I’m disgusted.

I unclench my fist and I feel something wet hit my leg. I look down and find marcia with her hands clenched around my leg, her eyes as big as the moon.

I softly pull her hands away from my leg and she gives me a look. For an eight year old, she sure got my mothers hard look down pat.

Hell, I felt bad for whatever poor fella ended up with her.

If he got me first, that is.

“Mom said you needed to help me with the cranberries.” When she smiles I notice red stains on her teeth and I wonder how much she actually helped with the cranberries. It looked like she wore most of them.

I heave a comical sigh for her benefit and try to hide my smile.

“I don’t know..” I bring my hand under my chin and run it back and forth. “Cooking isn’t very manly.”

She crinkles her nose at me and points behind her to the counter. I look over her small shoulder to see what she was pointing at and I out right laugh.

Jose has a knife in one hand and a can of cranberries in the other. His face is bunched up in confusion and he looks at the can like it might bite him. When he hears me laughing, he looks up and shoots me a dark look.

I smirk back at him and turn to Marcia in time to see her stomp one foot on the ground. She has a very determined look on her face.

“It is so manly. Look at Jose!”

“Oh, I’m looking.”

I laugh again and swiftly stand up before she can hit me. She had a really bad habit of hitting people when she thought they were making fun of her.

Before she has the chance to frown, I grab her by the waist and pull her up. She squeals and I set her on my shoulders while she laughs in my ear.

“Julio!” My mother shouts, a smile in her voice. “If you wake Louis, I will make you have diaper duty.” She turns away from the food on the stove, a dirty spoon in one hand.

That smile is still plastered on her face and I try not to focus on the anger wrapping it’s way around me. Today was Thanksgiving and I swore I would not ruin it.

While my family was Mexicano, we still celebrated the American holidays. Though, we did add our own little Hernandez twist to it.

Who else has tamales and cranberries for Thanksgiving?

I lean over and give her a light kiss on the cheek, trying my hardest not to tell her how I feel. If I did, I knew she would probably be reduced to tears. Mi madre was a good person, but her blind faith and love in my father was her biggest downfall.

Love was a heartless bastard.

“Nah, I’m too good looking to have diaper duty.” She tries to smack me in the shoulder with her spoon and I dip out of the way, Marcia shrieking with laughter from the sudden movement. Mi madre shoots me a look, pushing her bangs out of her face.

“If you are so good looking, why haven’t I seen any girls over here yet? Your old mother here is waiting to give the person you have been thinking about a proper meeting.”

“What?” I ask, startled. I didn’t mention any girl to her at all and when she sees the shock on my face, she laughs.

“Don’t play me as a fool Julio. I see that look on your face. Whoever she is, I give her the best of luck. But, baby,” She lays a soft hand on my shoulder. “Be careful, please. I don’t need any grandsons or daughters any time soon.”

I flinch at her words and move out of her embrace. She didn’t need to worry about kids any time soon. Hell, the last time I had sex was... My mind ventures off and the mention of sex brings me to the only girl my mother could be talking about.

These past two days since arriving home, I haven’t had the time to contact Kelsey. My mind was so wrapped up in my father and Pacho that I couldn’t find the time to actually call her. That doesn’t mean I haven’t thought about her though.

No, I wasn’t lucky enough for that. That girl has polluted my body, from my mind to the depths of my heart. Every time I thought about her my heart would pick up and my hands would start to sweat.

It’s was fucking sickening, but I just couldn’t help it.

The chick has changed me.

Damn did she. Since spending time with her I start to realize what Aiden told me so many times when I called him a pussy for changing for Mia.

He told me that when you find someone you care about, they change you. He said he didn’t exactly know how it works, but one day you just wake up and realize you want to be a better man.

I want that.

I wanted to be a better man.

I wanted Kelsey to look at me and not be disappointed in what she sees. I can’t change the things I have done in the past, but I was control of my future.

That is, as long as Pacho continues to stay out of the picture. But, I don’t know how long that will last.

I’m so lost in my thoughts that I don’t notice the doorbell ringing until Jose yells at me in Spanish to get my ass to the door. Mother shoots him a look and he has enough decency to look guilty.

I help Marcia off my shoulders and promise her to help with the cranberries before I head to the door.

My shoulder tense when I get closer. Would Pacho risk coming to my house? If so there was nothing I wouldn’t do to keep him from meeting my family. I would do anything to protect them and when I said anything, I meant that with every fiber of my being.

I hesitantly turn the lock and pull the door open slightly. When I see a guy, six foot and full of black hair, I curse softly under my breath.

“Aiden, what the fuck are you doing here?”

I knew he was spending his thanksgiving with Mia and his family but the moment I take in his messed up clothes and the dark circles under his eyes, I jerk the door back all the way.

“The hell happened?” He doesn’t say anything, just pushes past me and heads inside.

“Okayyy.” I state, closing the door behind him. The dude looked a damn mess. Whatever happened to him he was taking it pretty hard.

Aiden greets everyone in the kitchen with a smile before heading to the back sliding glass door. Shooting a look over my shoulder at Jose, clearly telling him to take my spot, I follow Aiden onto the back porch. The minute I slide the door close, he speaks.

“I fucked up dude.”

I reach into my back pocket and pull my cigarettes out. I knew from his words this was going to be something big so I needed something deadly to keep my mind occupied.

I offer him one and he takes it, grabbing for the lighter before I can offer him it. He lights it fast and hands me it back, blowing smoke into the air.

I follow suite and it’s quite for a moment. The last time Aiden looked like this was awhile ago when him and Mia got in a fight at that lame ass Michigan Blue ball.

He ended up punching me in the face and if he decided to swing at me this time, I hope he knew I would swing right the fuck back.

“Mia knew about the ring. And the money. The whole damn time.” He finally says.

I lean against my house and continue to blow smoke into the air. I don’t say anything because I knew he wasn’t done.

I was right.

He rubs the hand with the cigarette across his forehead and he makes a sound in the back of his throat. “She found the ring and I was so shocked and pissed off for no good reason that I pretty much ruined everything. I ended up practically throwing the ring back in her face. But, man, I was so pissed. There is not one thing I kept from that girl and there she was lying to me.”

I pull my cigarette from my mouth and kick off the wall. I flick it to the ground and put it out with my boot, letting the silence grow thick until I finally tell him what I think. He wasn’t going to like it, but I didn’t give to donkey asses.

“I think you are one stupid mother fucker.”

Aiden jerks his head up, smoke curling in front of his face. I don’t flinch away from his glare and I continue.

“You let your pussy ass feelings get in the way of a good girl. So what if she didn’t tell you she was worried about the money? Hell you should be glad she even cared in the first place. You should have told her about you going to Masons and she should have told you about knowing. But you both didn’t. And now look. You were willing to commit to this girl a few days ago, make a wife out of her, and now you're throwing that shit away because she got your balls in a twist?”

Aiden shakes his head, throwing the cigarette on the ground and stomping it out. He angles his head toward the sky and lets out his breath before speaking.

“Remind me to never come to you for emotional shit anymore. You don’t help.”

I shrug, sticking my hands into my pockets. “You didn’t come here for support. You came here for honesty and that’s what the hell I gave you.”

Aiden curses under his breath, dragging his hands through his hair. He closes his eyes painfully and grimaces.

“You are right. I did fuck up and now it’s too late to fix it.”

I look through the glass door and see Marcia pulling cranberries in her mouth, Jose laughing under his breath the whole time. My mother continues to hum by the stove and I realize that he’s wrong.

It’s never too late to fix something. No matter what happens, no matter how far down a road you are, you always have the choice to get the hell out.

I know that now.

If my father wanted too, he could have left the drugs alone. If I wanted too, I could have said no to Pacho and took the repercussions. Life was all about one big choice and nobody had control over your life but you.

For some reason I think of Kelsey. Even though she had a hard life when it came to guys, she decided to take a chance on me.

Something that confused the hell out of me. What the hell did that girl see in me? Why was she willing to put her heart on the line for a guy like me?

Life is about choices and at that moment I realize I was going to be a guy Kelsey could be proud of. I was going to be the guy my father never could.

I was going to watch over my family, no matter what it took, not because I had to but because it was who I was.I wasn’t a guy to give up and watching Aiden stand in front of me, saying it was too late, pissed me off.

So I do something stupid.

He turns away from the sky and when he finally  looks back at me, I arch my hand back and punch right in the face. He doesn’t see it coming and stumbles back, his hands coming up to cover his nose.

He holds his hands there and looks up at me with shock and a little of respect.

“What was that for?” He bites out, wiping under his nose and pulling away with a little blood on his hands.

Yeah, that would leave a nasty bruise later. Reaching over for my leather jacket, I slip it on and shoot him a look.

“I still owed you back for punching me that one time. I realized this was a good time to return the favor since you are talking nonsense.” He shakes his head, his hand going back to his nose.

“If you broke it Hernandez, I’m beating your ass.”

I laugh. “They day you beat my ass Cash is the day I stop being a Hernandez. Now shut the hell up and come on. You have a girl you need to apologize too.”

I start to walk around him, heading to the front, and he follows behind.

“Mia’s not home. She’s at Kesley.”

Fucking perfect.

I try not to react to the words and that seems to humor Aiden more. “And besides, what the hell am I going to say with her whole family there?”

“Better start practicing,” I tell him as I signal for him to head to his car. He nods and I make my way to the passenger seat, my mind not focusing on the way my heart picks up at the prospect of seeing Kelsey.

“Because whatever the hell you say better be good. You don’t want to embarrass yourself again.”

“If a bruise starts to show up by the time I get there, I really will beat your ass. I can’t believe you punched me. Hell dude.”

I shrug, opening his door. “Like I said, you deserved it. Don’t think I don’t remember you punching me because of this chia before.”

“At least I apologized.”

“Sorry.” I shoot over my shoulder before I make my way into the car. “Now get the hell in the car and come on. We have a Thanksgiving dinner to ruin.”

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