Laredo s1e18- "That's Noway Thataway" (unaired "Texas Guys" pilot)

Chapter 4

So they went on until they got to a fork in the road.

The sign said Lubbock was a hundred miles away in one direction and Whiskey Flat was a quarter mile away in the other direction.

Dudley adjusted his glasses and read the signs.

"Lubbock, a hundred miles. Wanna try for it?" he said.

"Shh! He'll faint" said Newton pointing at the horse. 

Then he had a look at the signs himself. "Why don't we try for Whiskey Flat? It's the nearest; maybe we could pick up some eating money."

"Good idea. I'm starving. Let's go" said Dudley. 

He was about to get up and leave, but Newton stopped him. 

"Strategy. I'll go in first" said Newton.

"And leave me out here alone? Whatever for?" said Dudley.

"Because there are two of us."

"You and me, right?"

"Right. And if they're going to be looking, they'll be looking for the two of us" said Newton.

"You and me."

"Right again."

"But why will they be looking for us?" Dudley asked.

"Because we're touring actors who recently run afoul of the local constable!" Newton almost shouted. 

"Oh, you mean the sheriff" Dudley sighed.

"Right again, Dudley. You're improving; you really are, you know" said Newton patting his partner's shoulder. "Look, I'll tell you what. I'll go in alone, I'll trace the town and I'll find out what's happening. If the cost is clear, I'll post some hand-bills, hire a haul, and we'll see what happens."

"Wonderful," said Dudley sadly, "But you're still leaving me out here alone and it's Indian country."

"Oh, don't be silly! I'll wait if there is an Indian within five hundred miles of here" said Newton. 

And just as he said that, they heard an Indian call. 

A native American tribe was riding their horses along the path and stopped right in front of the stage coach.

"How" said Dudley.

"How what?" said the Indian.

"Just how" said Dudley. 

The Indian looked at Newton. "Who you?"

"Me?" said Newton. 

He put his hat back on and picked up an American accent. "I'm a marshal. I'm the marshal of Gunswitch Gulch."

"He's a great friend of the Indians" said Dudley.

"And a mighty warrior" said Newton.

The Indian chief saw right through this disguise. "Him no marshal. Him actor. Him on stage Three Forks!"

Newton laughed awkwardly. "Really. Did you see the show?"

"We see show."

"And what did you think of it?" 

The Indian plugged his nose. "Ugh!"

The tribe then rode in the other direction.

"Savages" Newton mumbled.