Viking Tribute

Chapter 33: Fear

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For a week he kept me in his room, letting me out for the meals and leading me to the bath house. Mildred brought me my morning gruel and applied healing balm on my hands.

"There, another day and they will be as knew."

I looked at my fingers, wrapped in fine linen bandages, and sighed. This was so unnecessary. They were acting as if I had suddenly turned into precious glass.

"I can't wait to go out again. I am beginning to hate this room." I was bored to death, despite the couple of manuscripts that had been entrusted to me; a Gospel and a Psalter, richly illuminated and likely stolen during a raid. While they had helped me in my prayers, they were not very entertaining.

"Have you seen Hrefna recently? Her glare made my blood ran cold on Geol night, I am worried she must be preparing something."

Mildred frowned. "Be very careful around her. With you in disgrace, she had hoped to catch Lord Einarr in her web. Now you stand between her and her goal, the child in your belly an advantage that she cannot match. Even the kindest dog will bite when cornered, and kindness is not her stronger point."

"Do you think she would..." I crossed my arms on my belly. She wouldn't dare attacking my bearn. I would push her off the cliffs.

"I am certain she will try to harm you if she finds a way to do so unnoticed. Do not accept any food that is not coming from me, Svana or Lord Einarr. It is a good thing that he has taken to hand feed you again."

I blushed. At the dining table I had resumed my humble position, kneeling by my master's side, where he coaxed me into eating far more than I would have otherwise. He was picking the most succulent morsels to stimulate my appetite, and it was working. I could feel my body fattening by the day.

"And what of Lady Disaelfr? What should I do if she sends me a medicine or a salve?"

Mildred paused to consider. "You shouldn't use it until I say it's safe. Lady Disaelfr's knows the herbs better than I do. I do not believe she would take the risk to harm her grandchild, and yet..."

"You are not certain."

Averting her gaze, Mildred pursued. "She was with Lord Einarr's wife when she fell..."

"You cannot mean..." My hand flew to my mouth. While I had a doubt whether my owner's first wife had slipped or jumped to her death, it had never occurred to me that she might have been pushed.

"I mean nothing, I'm just pointing out a fact. We will never know exactly what happened, but we guess what might. And this is one of the possibilities. After all, that woman was a whore and her fruit a bastard."

I scooted over to the headboard, pressing my back on the hard wood. Bringing my knees up, I pulled the blankets to my chin, creating a protective cocoon for my little one. I wouldn't let any harm come to him.

I behaved like a mad woman for a few days, looking over my shoulder and avoiding dark corners. Being free to move now terrified me. I would only drink water from the bucket if someone else had done it before my eyes. My breakfast was taken from the middle of the pot, and not eaten until everyone else had finished theirs unscathed. During the day I spun and weaved amongst the other women, keeping my back to the wall. Whenever I had to wander outside, I waited for a trusted person to go with me.

Lady Disaelfr seemed to have taken my education at heart. She gave me an endless streak of advice about hospitality, household supervision, winter preparation... It was a lot to take in in my state of mind. Yet I understood that she was trying to prepare me to take over her role and listened. I didn't remember it all though. My fear was distracting me.

Two weeks went by and nothing happened. Progressively, I calmed down. I felt silly for letting panic engulf me. If something were to happen to me, Lord Einarr's ire would be terrifying. Surely Hrefna wouldn't risk being on the receiving end of it.

I had retired for the night with Lord Einarr when we heard a shy knock. When he opened the door, a little girl bowed to him. She held a wooden cup tight to her chest, as if it was her most precious treasure. I recognized her; she was the daughter of Eimear, a thrall from Eiriu. Her father could have been any of the guests serviced by her mother. It didn't matter; born of a slave, she was a slave, regardless of who sired her. Yet she was so sweet, with rosy cheeks and curly blonde hair.

Even Lord Einarr couldn't resist her charm. He crouched in front of her, smiling. "What do you want, pretty one?"

"Mildred says to give this to Sunngifu." She handed him the cup with all the formality her five springs could muster.

"It will be done. You fulfilled your duties well, my dear. Tell your mother she can be proud of you."

I swore the grin would split her face. "Thank you, my Lord." She bolted, impatient to tell her mother the news.

We couldn't help laughing. He passed me the steaming beverage. I winced. I didn't like the smell of it. Mildred had a talent for foul tasting concoctions.

"You should drink it while it's warm."

I wanted to roll my eyes at him. I was no child to be reminded this. I took a tentative sip. It was bitter and burning and I spat most of it.

"It is too warm. I have it later." I put the cup down, and soon forgot all about it.

In the middle of the night I woke up sweating. My heart was racing and my lower back was sore. I thought I had a bad dream and tried to go back to sleep. I turned and tossed until Lord Einarr woke up. I had no relief. It was getting worse.

"Is something wrong Sunngifu? Why are you awake?"

"I am not feeling very well..." I winced as my head began to hurt. His hand went on my belly and he froze.

"You stomach is hard as a stone. I'll get help."

He ran out while I curled in a ball. The pain was now pulsing all around my midst like a belt. It came and went as a brutal wave.

The door flew open and Mildred was in the room, a cloak hastily thrown over her smock. Lady Disaelfr followed suit and Mildred turned around, facing her. "I can handle this, my Lady, you should go back to your bed."

"You are not the mistress in this house, Mildred, do not forget your station."

"My Lord", she pleaded, "Sunngifu needs help. A fight will only disturb her".

Lord Einarr shook his head. "My mother is a skilled healer, let her assist you. Mother, Mildred is Sunngifu's friend, she will feel safer treated by her."

Lady Disaelfr nodded stiffly. "As you wish, my son. I hope for my grandchild's sake that you are making the right decision."

Mildred had already ran to my side. She checked my forehead and my belly, muttering as she did. "Did you eat or drink anything foul? You seemed well in the evening."

I blinked and pointed to the cup. "Only the medicine you sent me."

"I didn't send you anything tonight!" Mildred seized the cup and brought it to her nose. "Yew, the seeds, most likely. If it were the leaves, you'd be dead. It might kill the child, and you. How much did you take?"

"Barely any, the taste was so bad I couldn't swallow it." I was terrified.

"If it is so, we might stand a chance. Have you got some crampbark and chamomile my Lady?"

Lady Disaelfr was already rushing out. "I'll add valerian too. It will make her sleep."

Mildred approved and followed her. She wouldn't trust Lord Einarr's mother. They soon came back with a bowl.

"Drink." My master held my head while I gulped the mixture. They had added honey, it wasn't so bad. Soon I was dozing off.