𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃, max verstappen

19 ; life doesn't function that way

"He looks happy." I sighed as I let myself fall back into the garden-seat I was sitting in, watching Lewis and Mick chasing after Benedict and Jack. Mick had a really hard time accepting how everything went after the press posted infinite paragraphs about the young Schumacher's and my relationship.

He stayed with us until I would feel better eventually, but right now I was happy my unbiological brother was with me, that he stood my side whatever was coming next. I would always have his back, no matter what I did or what happened to me.

I had neglected him for too long but still, that didn't change anything. He still felt like my brother, he still felt like the peace I wasn't able to feel when he wasn't with me.

Lewis and George were my best friends too, but no one could replace the blonde man. No one could take his place, for I have known him the longest. We have been friends ever since I was born, actually. Our parents had a strong bond before Michael's accident and still, he deeply cared for his old friend.

I wanted to have what they had. When I was old and wrinkly, I wanted to know Mick by my side. I wanted to know that he wouldn't leave me, that he would stand by me until death do us apart.

But I knew that was just a beautiful illusion.

"They are." My mother answered, giving me a tired smile as she put on her sunglasses. The sun had already set and was lightening the sky with her rays. It was warm and I could feel the breeze running over my skin.

"And they make you happy, too."

Lewis didn't care about the races. He didn't care that he needed to be on track. He called in sick, though my father knew he wasn't. He was staying at ours until I told him to fuck off and do his work, fulfil his damn duties and stop thinking about me.

But he didn't — Couldn't.

"Of course they do," I honestly answered, still looking in the distance where the men were chasing my little brothers. "They're my best friends."

I didn't believe in all that you can only have one best friend shit. I chose whoever I wanted, claimed whoever I wanted as my best friend.

And those two were truly my big brothers, because actions spoke louder than some stupid bloodline.

They acted like my brothers, they had the exact same attitude as big brothers.

"I know." Susie stated, now looking into the distance, too. I looked at her and wondered how I deserved a mother like her, how I deserved someone like her in my life. She was precious to me. She was everything I couldn't be, she was everything I wanted to be.

Suddenly, we were startled by my father running outside, now chasing after the four of them. They laughed, running away from him with a faster pace than before. Benedict and Jack weren't as fast as Mick and Lewis, but nobody cared about any of that. They had fun, they lived their lives, they enjoyed the moment.

And I cherished it, wanted to put it in the back of my head so I would always be able to remember.

But life didn't function that way.

My mind didn't function that way.

Susie and I laughed when Toto tackled Mick and Lewis into the pool at once. They laughed too, splashing with the cool water. Benedict and Jack wanted to jump in too, but Susie warned them not to, as they weren't the best swimmers.

Every time I looked at the little Benedict my heart ached for my other brother I had absolutely no contact with, the other Benedict.

It sounded ironic, didn't it?

Bene should be twenty one by now and he should have started a career by now. He lived at Stephanie's, my biological mother that could never seem to be my mother.

The reason for me to live at my dad's and have Susie, who was more mother to me than Stephanie could ever be.

And with her, I had no contact anymore, either.

It was for the better, I figured.

She hated my existence and made that really clear. She would tell me here and then, then apologising for being 'such a bad mother'. She would not cook for me or not care for me. She always preferred Bene over me, though he was younger than me. I lived before him, but she still chose him over me any chance she would get.

"Do you want to talk about what happened?" Susie offered. I knew she would comfort me when I needed it, knew she wouldn't judge me for my actions —

But still, I couldn't bring up the strength to talk about Max breaking my heart once again.

"I don't." My voice betrayed me, vanishing into thin air as soon as it left my mouth and I hated it, hated how Max was still my weak spot, how he could break me not only once and still managed to be on my mind every damn minute I was awake.

Every minute, except when Mick was around me.

Because when he was with me, I shut everything out. My mind goes blank.

"That's okay," She smiled at me, putting her hand on mine. Her hands were warm and her palms were sweaty while mine were cold and didn't sweat at all. "But I'll be there if you want to talk, I'll always be there for you, nugget."

A warm feeling spread in my chest when she called me by my nickname and a smile approached my lips before I could fight it.

I knew she was there.

I knew she would always be there.

"I know, and I truly love you for that."