Your kisses would leave me breathless. Your touches would always be gentle and soft. Such a heart fluttering feeling. It would constantly create a surge of electricity to shoot through my body. And, that sensation always sent a shiver down my spine in the most pleasurable way. I gasped every time. The feeling was beautiful.
41
Was.
Now, your kisses were short and meaningless. Your touches happened less and less. I rarely felt your smooth skin pressed up naked against mine. And now, instead of a gasp, it was a whimper of pain that escaped me.
16
"I love you Lisa."
If you did, then why do your eyes scream boredom when you look at me now?
8
Why Jennie Kim?
44
It had been 4 months since you were forced to be in a relationship with the Exo member, Kai, for publicity. YG believed that the relationship would make blackpink rise on the charts.
5
Of course I was against it. You were too, but because we both were determined to hide our relationship of two years to keep blackpink intact, we reluctantly agreed.
So, sure, maybe it was easier to hide our love to the world, but if you and Kai were meant to be fake, then why did the relationship look so real?
14
I didn't want to believe it.
Until one night, during one of our movie nights, I was beside you Jennie, whispering how much I loved you in your ear while you were tightly pressed against my side. Your body was so warm and comforting. Your scent sent a wave of love to flow through me so carefully.
But, instead of kissing me and telling me that you were deeply in love with me too and couldn't live without me like you usually did, you simply hummed and typed away on the phone that laid in your hands.
I watched the fast pace of your thumbs tap the screen of your phone. Your sharp feline eyes shined and your smile reached your eyes so timidly.
You looked happy.
75
Your face screamed love while mine screamed longing and pain.
Jennie Kim, do you still love me?
Jisoo and Rosé once asked me, why do I keep doing this to myself?
I could never answer them.
They saw the pain in my eyes whenever you suddenly yelled at me or ignored me. They watched me smiling, trying to brush away the hurt. And, they watched the tears flow down my cheeks until I no longer had anymore tears left to shed and no longer had the voice to scream or cry. But before that, they were blind and deaf to my pain until that night.
41
Rosé was walking by the bathroom when she heard a stifled sob escape my throat. Rosé barged in only to gasp and scream for Jisoo to help me up from the floor with her.
My sobs had wracked my body so hard to the point I just couldn't stop. The pain was so paralyzing that I had fallen unconscious from not only by the pain, but by dehydration and exhaustion.
It was the night you left to go see Kai.
It was also the night I saw the marks on your neck when you came back.
