Spray Painted Buffoon with a Horribly Hard Chest!
CHAPTER 6
Jake
I was a breath away from kissing her when I felt my hand come in contact with a metal object. Apparently she felt it too, because the next moment I was pushed off her with what was surely a superhuman effort on her part.
Fortunately or unfortunately, in doing so the watch was ripped out of both our hands and went flying over the wall into the meadow, or rather, swamp, adjoining the parking lot.
I blinked.
She blinked.
We must have looked like a pair of blinking idiots.
“You fucking bastard! Do you have any idea how much that watch meant to me? How dare you throw it like that? How the fuck am I supposed to get it out of that filthy muddy swamp? Huh? Huh? Insensitive jerk!”
“Whoa there, I didn’t-”
“You didn't what, you dirty lout! Asshole! Poop-head! Spray painted buffoon with a horribly hard chest! My head still hurts and so does my wrist, you wrist yank-er! Sadist! Take that! And that!”
And yes, that’s the part where her two shoes hit me, smack in the face and chest. My reflexes were down because I was staring fascinated at this five-year-old in disguise. Seriously, she was even stomping her foot.
Her face was flushed and her eyes were bright with un-shed tears of anger, and suddenly I felt the urge to laugh. And then I was holding my stomach and laughing like there was no tomorrow. I held on to the handlebar of her motorcycle for dear life, just to make sure I didn’t fall to the ground laughing.
She was looking at me incredulously like she couldn’t believe what she was seeing. Then with eerie calmness, she picked up both her shoes, stuffed her feet in them, and yanked me off her bike by my shirt, which wasn’t difficult, since I was wobbling with laughter, and swung a leg over the bike.
The next moment she was gone, leaving me in the dust.
Literally.
I was still chuckling, until I caught myself thinking about those amazing legs of hers. That shut me up pretty quick. Still, I was in a pretty good mood when Boris opened the door to my condo. He'd been with us since before my parents died, and he'd stayed even though Ididn't live in a mansion anymore. He was basically family, along with Mary, his wife. They currently occupied the spare bedroom, which was more than fine with me.
“Hello, Boris my old man! How are you this fine sunny…evening?”
It took that long for us to clean the graffiti? Stupid principal.
“Are you drunk, sir?”
“Huh, what? No!”
“Then might I enquire as to the reason of your stinking good mood?”
Yeah, yeah, I know. Boris and I like to play the little ‘English butler scene’.
“No, you may not, Boris.”
“I’m afraid I must, sir. This might be infectious. Mary and I wouldn’t want to get contaminated.”
“Yeah, well, there’s no danger of that, since you already killed the microbes emanating from my good mood, you glum old man. Just let me in already!”
“Very well, sir.”
Grinning, I lounged on my couch, watching Iron Man. It’s weird I’m still in a good mood. I don’t feel like doing anything today. Just lazing around, eating, and then lazing around some more.
That’s when the phone rang.
“Kincaid here.”
“Still do that self important bit of greeting?” It was Alyssa, self professed bad girl who had a quite artisitic photographer for a boyfriend. Don't ask me how that happened.
“What can I say; everybody knows there’s only one Kincaid.”
“Alright mutt head. What about the party on Saturday?”
“What about it, Alyssa?”
“Cut the crap, Jake. Are you coming?”
“I don’t know Liz, don’t feel like being mobbed.”
“You are SUCH a pain! Why don’t you get yourself a decent girlfriend?”
“Why don’t you pretend to be my girlfriend? Problem solved. Every girl’s shit scared of you, Liz.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know, Jake, maybe because I’m too busy dating Carter? Yeah, that would be my lame excuse to not wanting to pretend date you.”
“It’s not fair that so many other people get the really sensible and fun and scary girls.”
“You calling me scary?”
“Just checking.”
“What?”
“If you were listening.”
A long suffering sigh at the other end.
“Just let me know if you change your mind. Bye.”
“Bye.”
Alyssa was fun. She was even scary sometimes.
Why couldn’t I be attracted to her? I mean, not now, before she started dating Carter.
Why Kayla of all people?
What?
Oh no no no no. This is not good. Debating with my mind about whether I’m attracted to this girl is so not good.
There’s no debate. You like her.
Shit. Time to shut your mind, Jake.
You wish.
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Yes. Matt Lanter okay? He's supercalifragilisticexpialidocious...or maybe just super hot. Anyway, yay for Jake xD Also, sorry for the shortness, but hey, I did post two chapters back to back right? Let this one be little :P
RandomFactAboutMe #6: I'm confused right now. I have no idea who to cast for Kayla. Should I just stick with Megan Fox? I've already changed her four times! HELP. HELP.
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