Chapter 32:: Mango Smoothies

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Chapter 32// Mango Smoothies

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"Hey, where are you off to?"

My hand slips on the doorknob and I stiffen in surprise. Slowly, I turn around to see Tammy behind me. She's wearing a dressing gown and baggy sweatpants instead of her usual tight clothes, and her hands twist together nervously as she watches me leave. I sigh, taking one last longing glance at the door, before turning around fully to face her. For the past two weeks, since she told Rita that my friendship with her was a scheme to begin with, things have been more than a little awkward between Tammy and me. In fact, if it wasn't for Tammy seeming to be out of the house ninety percent of the time, I'd probably be surprised that a confrontation hasn't occurred until now. I've been civil with my little sister, but overall ignored her. Maybe I should've given her a chance to explain herself, but then maybe she shouldn't have hurt and betrayed me in the first place.

"What is it, Tammy?" I look at the floor and cross my arms over my chest.

"You have every reason to hate me," Tammy begins, and I glance up to see her sad smile. "But please let me explain...Lois, we are sisters. I shouldn't have done what I did. I'm so sorry."

"Go on then, explain," I sigh, "Tell me why you would betray your own sister in preference for Rita Hall. Was it for popularity? Are you still angry at me for not listening to you?" I run a hand through my hair exasperatedly, "Or was it because I'm "Not good enough" for Jesse Dales and his crowd?"

Tammy winces, and I realise I'm probably coming on a little strong, but I don't feel like apologising. She's the one who leaves the house, who never speaks to me and acts as if I'm not even part of her family in front of her friends, and yet she betrays me like this. There's no way I would do this to her. Tammy frowns and clears her throat, "I'll be honest; I've been worried. I'm starting high school in a week, Lois. I wanted to be in with the popular people, to make sure I had friends...I thought that if I showed Rita my loyalty to her, she'd give me a shot. I didn't mean to hurt you: in my eyes at the time, you were a way to get what I wanted. I'm so sorry for that."

I think back to myself, aged fourteen, and how consumed I was with wanting popularity. I was entranced by the people who walked the high school halls with their heads held high: Jesse was one of them. I was fourteen when Jesse stood up for me against a jibing girl, in English. His popularity and good looks were one of the things that kept me a little intrigued by him for three years. Before starting high school, I think everybody sets out with the dream of being one of the it-crowd. What Tammy did to me hurt, but I could see why she did it. "Listen," I sigh, "I forgive you, because you're my baby sister and I love you, but believe it or not popularity isn't everything."

"Easy for you to say," Tammy shrugs, "You're popular now. You have the dream boyfriend, you're friends with the most popular people in school and your twin brother is a jock. You never wanted to be popular...and yet, it just springs its way into your lap due to a stupid accident."

"I have to admit, you have a point," I nod, grabbing her arm, "But the one thing people won't appreciate in the popular world, is using people. Trust me, I learnt the hard way. I used Rita to get closer to Jesse, and she used me for the same reason. Jesse used Rita to get closer to me. Do you see what I mean? Using people leads to fall outs, and hurt. You don't have to use me to get to popularity, Tammy. You're pretty. You're a diva. You have money. You have nothing to worry about: just be nice to people and make friends." I lean down to kiss her on the top of the head. "We'll talk later, okay? We can go to the Den, watch a chick flick with some popcorn and discuss all of our issues. Does that sound good?"

"That sounds amazing," Tammy smiles, "But where are you going now?"

"Well," I push my bag up my shoulder and straighten up. "I'm going to talk to Rita. Love you, see you later." I briskly wave her goodbye, before shutting the door behind me and heading over to my car. I guess I can be too forgiving with people sometimes...what Tammy did still hurts, but what's the use of holding on to something painful? People deserve second chances: whether that is my sister, Heather or Rita. They've all made mistakes to hurt me, but then I've hurt them too. With my newfound happiness and security, I don't think there's any better time to talk with Rita.

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