𝖢𝗋𝗎𝖾𝗅 𝖶𝗈𝗋𝗅𝖽 || 𝖲𝖳𝖤𝖵𝖤 𝖧𝖠𝖱𝖱𝖨𝖭𝖦𝖳𝖮𝖭

𝖢𝖧𝖠𝖯𝖳𝖤𝖱 7

Leah

Outrage.

It's what I was feeling at the moment.

I was furious. I was exhausted. And I was starting to suspect everything.

Why?

Well, you see, while Steve and Dustin were locked up in the Scoops break room, thinking nobody could hear them trying to crack some top-secret code from some Russian spies, I got a chance to talk to Robin. And guess what? Everything I heard, everything that hurt me, it never happened.

In fact, the only girl they mention was Dustin's girlfriend. Which was, by the way, a surprise to me.

How great! Now, not only was I seeing stuff, my mind was also deforming the real things... Making me hear things... What the fuck was going on? 

So, my question is: what's real then? 

Was my conversation with Jim last night real? Was I really here? Was this Robin real? Was I constantly dreaming? Was this mall real? Was Kelley real? Was anything real? Or was I in an endless daydream?

What was real?

I just felt terrible about the way I treated Steve. Refusing to give back all the touches, all the kisses. Barely answering him back. I couldn't, what if I said something I'd regret? What if I hurt him? I didn't want to do that to him, no matter how hurt I was.

Only to find out that there was actually no reason for me to be this hurt.

What was happening to me?

I needed to remedy this. I needed to do something about this.

With a guilty conscience, I walked into the room where Dustin and Steve were, with Dustin scolding me and trying to make me leave. Telling me about how busy they were, or something. I didn't really care. To be honest, that's the last thing I could care about. So, I walked straight up to my boyfriend and pulled him in for a kiss. A kiss that was an apology for what had happened, but also to ground myself in reality, in my safe haven.

"What are you doing?! We don't have time for this! We're about to become national heroes!" Dustin scolded, getting their dictionary thrown at him by Steve, who didn't want his young friend interrupting the moment.

He dropped whatever other object was in his hand on the table, without breaking the kiss, and held my waist to pull me even closer to him, preventing me from slipping away again. But I wouldn't. I'd never do that. No. I wanted to be in his arms forever, kiss him for the rest of my days. At least that felt real enough for me. Even if it wasn't real, at least it felt good.

Why was my mind playing with me? What for? To tear me apart? To make me break my soul again? No, not now... not when everything was finally fine. What did I have against myself?

I wish I knew the answer to those questions. I wish I had it in me to tell him, but... Would he believe me? Maybe. But he'd definitely think I was crazy, maybe even too crazy for him. Maybe he'd leave me... I couldn't do that. I couldn't let that happen. I wouldn't know how to deal with that. Not yet. There was still so much I needed to work on before I could go through that. So many thoughts. So much anxiety.

I should probably call Kelley.

Steve, though, didn't care a bit about what had happened. At least, it didn't seem to cross his mind at the moment. He was too busy profiting from my change of mind. Enjoying my arms around his neck, and forgetting everything around us. Which only made our curly-hair friend grow more indignant.

"Are you kidding me?! Harringotn, stick to the plan!" He screamed at the grown up, who could care less.

"Alright, babysitting time is over," Robin said, entering the room, interrupting Dustin. "My board! That was important data, shitbirds!" she said, making Steve break the kiss, scared of his co-worker, but not letting me go for a second.