Rainbows After the Rain (Fuck and Forget Series #1)

45.

Rainbows

Nakatulala akong napaupo sa gilid ng kama. Hindi ko alam kung anong irereact ko sa nangyari.

Hindi parin ako makamove-on sa nangyari. I felt like I lost my mind. I fucking lost my dignity. I was embarrassed to fucking death.

"N-natatae ako!" he ran fast outside as he left me standing there shocked and dumbfounded.

Humalumbaba ako sa nakaparteng hita at marahas na napamura. I palmed my face and let out a sharp sigh. The fuck? I asked him to marry me and he answered that... natatae siya? Fuck. Hindi ko alam kung matatawa ba ako maiinis sa nangyari eh.

Tumayo ako at pumasok sa bathroom. Hinila ko ang shirt sa likuran at tinapon iyon sa laundry basket. I took off my pants and entered my shower to calm myself before I lost my fucking mind.

He's not yet ready to get married, Nick. At least now, you had him back. You just need to wait.

You said to take things slow, right? Hindi ba't masyado kang nagmamadali kung kasal agad?

You've done this before, Nick. You're only going to repeat it this time. Baby steps. Slowly. Don't scare him!

Pagkatapos kong magshower ay nagbihis ako ng simpleng gray sleeveless trunks at blue beach shorts. Lumabas ako ng room at naupo muna sa mga bato malapit sa seashore.

"Hindi mo nasuyo?"

Tumingin ako sa likuran nang marinig ang boses ni Lade. Alam kong nag-iinuman 'yong mga kasama namin at tumakas lang 'to.

We always have a drink like the old times whenever the FAF boys are all complete. It's only different now that we've matured. We've got responsibilities to face so he didn't drink much. Takot masermonan ng asawa.

"I did. Umalis nga lang. Hindi ko alam kung nasaan pero nand'yan lang 'yan." I shrugged.

Pumulot ako ng bato at pinagbabato ko iyon sa malayo. Malakas ang hampas ng hangin. Medyo natatalsikan nga ako dahil nakaupo ako sa bato.

"How's life going?"

"Half good and not, dude. Married life isn't easy." Humalakhak siya.

Natawa ako at napailing-iling. Mas malaki nga lang ang responsibilidad niya kaysa sa akin.

"What's wrong?" Aniya nang mapansin ang hindi maipintang mukha ko. He was brushing his hair because the harsh wind was messing with it.

I sighed. Tinukod ko ang dalawang braso sa magkabilang gilid ng bato para balansehin ang katawan. Tumingala ako sa buwan at medyo kumalma dahil katulad iyon ng mga mata ni Kaede.

"I proposed..."

"And?"

"Got rejected, I guess..." I shrugged.

"Damn... that hurts man," tinapik niya ang balikat ko.

Bumuntong-hininga ako. Muli akong tumingala sa buwan kaya kumalma ako ulit.

"Why don't you do it the hard way?"

Kunot-noong nilingon ko siya, nakatingala parin ang ulo sa langit.

"Like what you did huh?"

Humalakhak siya. "Yes, dude. Do it the hard way. Something he couldn't resist..."

Gago. Sinulsulan pa ako ng mga hindi pang inosente niyang gawain. This motherfucker, really. Napailing-iling ako.

And on the second thought, if I am that desperate to tie that cutie in my surname, maybe I would do the same thing Lade did. But I don't want to force Kaede.