The Winner

The Butterfly Effect

The butterfly effect is the idea that small events can have large consequences. It's a concept that's part of chaos theory, which states that systems are sensitive to initial conditions and that small differences can lead to big differences in the future.

*****

*Nate*

It's time for a serious talk. I need to know where Trisha's head is at. What she is thinking about doing now that we know she's pregnant. Ultimately, it is her decision.

Julia is at Griffith Park with James, and Trisha is in my bedroom sitting by the window. I study her for a moment before she notices my presence.

She's casual today, wearing a pair of black workout leggings and a hot pink tank top that hugs her body. Her blonde hair is up in a ponytail. I'm sporting my usual attire when home, which is my favorite green Nike T-shirt that I have to constantly steal back from my little clothes thief, Julia, and a pair of grey Nike sweatpants.

Trish is lost in her own thoughts for a minute before noticing me standing in the doorway. She looks over at me with a blank expression and then back out the window.

I join her and take the chair across from her to look out the window as well. That damn bird shit all over my patio furniture, and I swear it is now staring right at me.

"Is now a good time? Can we talk?" I lean forward to take Trisha's hand, and she nods.

"What happens now?" I ask nervously.

"I made an appointment with my doctor. She'll see me at the end of the week. You're welcome to come with me if you'd like." Trisha pauses when she sees my expression.

I've never gone to any of her doctor appointments. Why would she invite me now? Is this something I'm supposed to do? I guess I never put much thought into it.

"Nate, I'm not having an abortion if that's what you're thinking." Trisha squints her eyes at me like that is what I was dwelling on.

"I'm not thinking anything. I will support whatever decision you make, Trisha. It's your body. You know I would never ask you to do something you're not 100% sure of."

"Because I'm not doing that. So... " She says in a standoffish way like that is something I was insinuating by my lack of response. "I guess this is it? We're having a baby together?" She studies my face, and I nod but can't help but look away. 

"You never wanted children.." Her voice trails off.

"It doesn't matter what I want." I say, but as the words come out, they fall flat.

"I'm sorry, Nate. Forgetting my pill... that's on me. I fucked up. I'm sorry."

"We both fucked up. We should have never slept together in the first place. This changes everything." I scratch my jawline, and as much as I tried to hold it in, I start to cry while looking out the window. I don't even care. Trisha is one of the few who have seen me cry before.

"So you regret it...."

I turn back and meet her eyes and notice the way my words came out hurt her.

But the reality is- Yes. I regret it. Of course I regret it. We are both at fault and because I couldn't resist temptation and she didn't pay attention to her birth control pill, we're having a baby. Had I known she could get pregnant, I would have worn a condom. But it's too late now. What's done is done.

One small event will change our entire future.

And Julia's.

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