𝚈𝚘𝚞, 𝙼𝚎, 𝚄𝚜, 𝚃𝚘𝚐𝚎𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 (𝙻𝚎𝚡𝚒 𝙶𝚛𝚎𝚢 & 𝙹𝚘 𝚆𝚒𝚕𝚜𝚘𝚗)

𝙷𝚎𝚛𝚎'𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝙵𝚞𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝙳𝚊𝚢𝚜

"What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it"

                       —  Jiddu Krishnamurti

5x23

Rosemary walked into the kitchen where Derek and Meredith were.

"I'm moving out" Rosemary said grabbing a water from the fridge.

Meredith turned to look at her. "What, why?"

"It's time i find my own place"

Derek looked up from the paper he was reading. "Um... when are you planning on moving out?"

"Probably by the end of the week or next week, gotta find a place and put an offer on it" Rosemary said and then started to walk out of the kitchen, but then stopped and turned back to face them. "Just thought I should let you two know"

"Wait, is this about Lexie?"

Rosemary stopped for a moment and shook her head. "No" she said and then went to her to get ready for work.

Rosemary was a nurse station looking over a patient file when she saw Lexie looking at a file in front of her.

Rosemary sighed before closing the file and walked over to her. "Lexie"

Lexie looked up from the file and over to Rosemary. "Oh, did you need something?"

"I just wanted to apologize"

"For what pushing me away? For breaking up with me?" Lexie asked turning to face her.

Rosemary nodded her head. "Yes. For both of those things"

Lexie nods her head and looked down at her feet and crossed her arms, before looking back up at Rosemary. "Why did you do it in the first place?"

"I... look whatever I tell you, you can't be mad at G-" Rosemary said but was cut off by her pager going off. "I have to go"

Lexie nods her head. "Okay"

Rosemary then begins to walk away and makes her way to Izzie's room.

Rosemary stood in Izzie's room looking at her for a few seconds.

"Izzie. Izzie. Izzie" Rosemary said gaining Izzie's attention after calling her name for the third time. "You paged me. Are you okay?"

"No. I don't know what to do. I don't know if  I should have the surgery. I think I'm gonna die either way. You gotta tell me what to do"

"You know what to do Iz"

Izzie shakes her head a little. "No, I don't. I don't"

Rosemary sighed a little and moved to sit next to her. "Yes, you do, deep down you know it to. You're just scared to do it, and that's okay everyone is scared of something. But this back and forth is just the fear talking. But you have already made the decision, and you know you have. You made it the second you decided to fight this thing" she said and placed a hand on her back. "Just look... where you have started and now look where you are now. I mean, now you're  this... incredible surgeon, and an incredible teacher. You are a doer, remember?"

Izzie chuckled and leaned into her for a hug and Rosemary smiled and hugged her back.

"You know exactly what you have to do, and I'll be here every step of the way, only if you want me to of course, cause you are my best friend after all"

Izzie smiles. "And you are mine"

[570]