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"Sometimes shutting off the world is the best option" -Amara
Lost, that's the perfect word to describe Amara. She felt like she had nowhere to go with a dad who left her years ago and her hospitalized mom. Can this girl from a...
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"There are people out there that care about you and want to see you happy, Amara. I, want to see you happy." -Zubair Hassan, FH.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN: Is This Love?
Amara Abdullahi
It feels so good to be back in Florida, I thought to myself with a sigh of relief. I never thought I'd be this happy to be back home in Miami. Like, seriously, even though I liked France there was just way too much drama there. I'm happy to escape the drama my father brought onto all of us. Alhamdulilah I'm just so happy to be back home, there really is no place like it. I then looked to my right and saw Hamid standing next to me with unreadable expression written on his face. He's been like that ever since he saw Amir back in the hotel a couple of days ago. I don't get whats wrong with him. Why does he hate Amir so much? Shouldn't he be guiding that hate to the one person who made our lives a living hell? The one who got drunk all the time and left us without contacting us for almost 7 years.
"What?" Hamid snapped at me looking annoyed as hell.
"What's your problem!?" I snapped back at him. If he were a girl I'd think it was his 'time of the month' if you know what I mean. But he isn't so I honestly can't come up with an explanation as to why he's so moody."Why do I have to have a problem? Huh!? Can't I ever just have a bad da-" His sentence was cut off by a girly scream. Wait a minute I know that voice! I've lived with that voice for 6 years now. "Mahirah!" I squealed as I ran to my little sister and gave her a hug. Oh my God you have no idea how much I've missed this little goof ball! 2 weeks without seeing her felt like 2 years! "Hey!" I heard another girly voice. I turned around and saw both Amran and Nur standing there smiling at us. The first thing I noticed was Amran's stomach got bigger in such a short amount of time.
I let go of Mahirah just as Hamid walked up to her and gave her a hug. I then approached my older sister with a smile on my face and give her a hug. I'm happy to see her but there's still something at the back of my head nagging at me. She knew about Amir and hid him from all of us. You know whats worse than that? She never even gave him a chance. She just pretended like he didn't exist and went on with her life. Oh god what a messed up family we are.
Zubair Hassan
"Yay you're back!" My little brother Uzair exclaimed as he continued to jump up and down happily.I grabbed little man and then swung him around in my arms just like I used to do when he was younger. I missed seeing his little cute face and I also can't believe I'm saying this but I actually missed Bayla too. I talked to Harun and Abdullah a lot when I was gone so I didn't miss them as much. "Honey sit down and relax." Mom insisted. I sat down in the living room couch and looked at the TV screen.
"We have a surprise!" Mom beamed as she looked towards the door.
I turned around and saw someone I didn't talk to for a long time. My older brother Ismail walked through the front door with his luggage in his hands. What's he doing here? He hasn't been here in over 4 years and he just now decides to come? Unbelievable. I've imagined this moment in my head over and over again for the past couple of years yet it didn't feel like how I thought it would. I thought I'd be relieved and happy, little did I know I would feel the complete opposite. While he was gone, I was the big brother everyone went to. I had to help my parents all by myself and help raise my four younger siblings. He was nowhere to be found.
"Mom!" He exclaimed as he ran to where our mother was sitting. She got up and hugged him tightly while I turned away. "How are you? Oh this is so great! Both of my son's are back." She said as she smiled through her tears. I immediately stood up and wiped the tears off of her face.
"Don't cry, mom."
"Bro how have you been?" Ismail asked casually. I rolled my eyes and started to walk away without answering him. Wait a second, I thought to myself. Why am I walking away? I always dreamed of the day I saw him so I could say exactly this. "How have I been? Let's talk about where have you been? Huh!? You haven't even come back to visit any of us in the last four years. And now you just walk through those doors like everything's okay?" I couldn't help it scoff. "I'm outta here."
I then stormed out of the house.
I don't know where I am going right now but I need to get away from him.
* * *
The park, that's where I went and where I always go to when something is on my mind and I have no better way of venting. It's like my outlet from this crazy messed up world, the moment I pick up a basketball I'm in a whole new place. I dribbled the ball a few times before shooting it into the basket. Like always it went in with ease.
"I guess you really can be an NBA player. Kobe would still kick your butt though." I heard a familiar voice say from behind me. I quickly turned around and see her. She smiled brightly at me while walking to where I was standing. I must be dreaming, did she actually smile at me? That's the first time I saw her smiling at me. She should do it more often, it suits her.
"You remembered?" I asked as I returned her smile.
"Of course. You seem upset, what's wrong?" Amara asked as she raised an eyebrow. This is really strange. She never asked what was wrong with me before. I didn't even think she cared. There it goes again, that thumping feeling in my chest. I feel so nervous whenever I'm around her. I've never been nervous around a girl before but now I am. Girls usually chase me...she's the first one who didn't. She's the first person who told me things that I needed to hear. She didn't sugar code things, she just told me what she felt. I know I sound so cliche right now but it's true.
I cleared my throat as I sat down on the bench. "It's my older brother," I started off. "You have an older brother?" She asked while sitting on the other side of bench across from me. "Yeah. He went off to college 4 years ago and he didn't bother to visit us or even call us. And now he just came home pretending like everything is okay and I just can't understand that. I used to look up to him you know? But now I don't even know him anymore." I said as I turned away. It was silent for a while, neither her nor I said anything. But at the same time it felt nice. Like we both understood each other on another level.
"I get what you're feeling. I went through the same thing with my dad except he didn't bother to contact us during the past 7 years. You're lucky yours came back and you could have your relationship back." She looked at her hands, not even bothering to face me. She knows too?
"He didn't come back?" I asked, feeling sad for her. I mean if my dad did that to us I'd never forgive him. "Well, he tracked me and Hamid down in Paris only to tell us we have another brother. I mean how could we forgive a man who walked away from five of his children? A guy who always got drunk and didn't care about what happens to us? Also I just figured out that Amran knew about Amir and didn't tell any of us and-" She stopped mid-sentence as tears leaked from her eyes. I immediately stood up and walked towards her. "Hey, remember what I said last time? It's okay to cry. You've been through a lot Amara. You're strong and Allah only tests people who he knows can take the heat," I stated as reassuringly as possible. "You shouldn't keep everything bottled inside of you. Sometimes you need to let others in. You don't need to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders and I hope that you know that. There are people out there that care about you and want to see you happy, Amara. I, want to see you happy."
"Thanks but I should get going," She said as she stood up. "Oh and thank you for returning my necklace. I was wrong about you Zubair. I'm sorry I miss judged you, you're a kind of a good guy."
"Kind of?" I joked which made her laugh.
"Shut up, that's the best you'll get. Also your brother sucks for cutting you off, he doesn't know what he's missing." She said as she walked away from the bench. I watched her until I couldn't see her anymore. It's crazy how this girl some how wrapped me around fingers the way she has.
I've never been this kind of guy. I've never thought about love and marriage before until now but somehow when I'm around her I do.
