xxv. | it affects everyone differently

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Disclaimer; I don't own spn. I wish I did. I also wish Alistair, Hawke, and Cullen from the Dragon Age Saga were real.

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"I keep telling myself I'm alright. The truth is, I'm not, not even close." -Stiles Stilinski (I think)

THEY WERE COPING. AT LEAST, THAT'S what Emery thought.

She was having night terrors. The hunter would wake up from a nightmare and spend the rest of the night staring at the ceiling. Emery thought about going to Dean's room, or even Sammy's, but she didn't want to disturb them.

Emery also didn't want to give away the fact that she was afraid. Yellow Eyes had enough power and influence to do that to them. What else could he do?

Also, she'd punch anyone in the face if they accused her of it. Emery had the facade to keep up for the Winchesters. They needed to know that even in the darkest of times, she'd be okay and push through it.

Dean was... Okay. Emery didn't know how to describe him. All he would do is either work on the Impala or drink. The brunette was worried about him, but she knew if she voiced it, she'd get snapped at. He might say he was fine, but his father's death hit him hard.

It was also the fact that he was supposed to be dead. Emery had said her goodbyes and was walking out, expecting to get to the next state before he had died, but he had to wake up.

She would have been fine without the drama the boys brought her. Sure, she'd mourn and weep for a month after and she'd show up for the funeral (if she was invited), but she would have been done.

Dean had woken up though and Emery couldn't leave him. She had grown attached, and in their business, that was bad. He could be used against her, and apparently to John, she was some powerful supernatural creature. If she was blackmailed into anything, the results would be catastrophic.

Sam, well, he was trying his hardest to make his father proud. Even in his death, John still has a hold on his boys. Sam would spend hours on end looking for a job that John would do or anything that seemed something the man would do. Or, he was looking for any omen that signalled the Demon was in any town of state.

Emery was glad Bobby let them stay in the mean time. She would die if the girl would stay on the open road with the boys for more than an hour.

The first time Emery had ever seen Dean cry was after they salted and burned John's body. Dean had booked a 'separate' room for Emery, but ended up in it later that night. The older boy had ranted his feelings to the brunette, before collapsed into a fit of sobs in her arms.

Emery hugged him, rubbing soothing circles into his back while singing Hey Jude. Dean had told her once that Mary used to sing it to him as a lullaby and Emery had learned it.

She was saving it for special occasions like this.

Sam had came to Emery when they had settled into Bobby's. Dean was out working on the Impala, Bobby ran into town to get supplies, and Emery had been reading the latest Carver Edlund book. Sam had stumbled into the living room where Emery was reading, a tired look on his face.

Emery had put the book down and scooted to the left side of the love seat she was residing on. Sam collapsed on it a second later and then he started ranting.

About John, about the Demon, about the hunts. Everything. About how annoyed he had gotten spending all that time holed up in the Impala with Dean. How Jessica's death had been bait for him to get back into the life. Even a little about Emery, who took no offence. She could be as annoying as Dean sometimes.

Emery then found the younger boy in her arms also, staining her shirt with his tears of frustration and sadness. The girl simply hugged him back, making sure to comfort the boy in anyway she could.

Though, Emery was wondering when she would explode into a fit of tears like she was bound to do.

That came in about three days. Two after Dean's and one after Sam's.

She had been reading the Carver Edlund book, having a strange feeling about reading the all too familiar situation. Until the father (John) had told Dean (the book character) that he grew up to fast and that he was proud of him.

Emery had let out a wail of despair. She had been already crying from the character that mirrored hers confessing her undying love and then the whole goodbye speech, but that pushed her over the line.

The brunette was expecting Sam or Dean to come running in, asking what was wrong, and why she was wailing and crying like a banshee. Instead it was Bobby, the man who was like a father to her.

Emery was glad it was Bobby, she didn't want Sam or Dean to see her in such a vulnerable state again. The girl was taken up to the bathroom, where Bobby had drew a hot bath, telling the girl to relax. That was of course after Emery had cried her way through an explanation and a ranting.

Bobby had listened to it without interrupting, and let the girl finish. He had gave her the comfort she wanted, before she had taken the bath and then went for a nap.

Dean had came into the room later, asking if she was okay. Emery had simply stated she was fine and that there was nothing to worry about. Though, she then fell back into the bed and had the worst nightmare yet.

She woke up later that night, a scream ready to rip its way through her vocal chords. She stopped it however, since the dream left her mind as soon as she shot awake.

All Emery knew was, John's death had affected them all in different ways. Some having an easy time coping, like Sam or Bobby. Others, like Dean and Emery, were having difficulty.

That was only because Dean wanted his father's approval and he had gotten it only when John was dying and Emery was having dreams about the many ways the yellow eyed demon could kill them. Or PTSD, or whatever.

Well, that's what the doctors think, anyways.

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edited.

i am not happy with this at all!

sorry, crappy filler. i just needed to do this so i could get into the next chapter. which starts into season two's real plot.

yay!

thanks for reading this sucky chapter, and vote and comment.

i love you all, bye!

p.s. i was watching ca: tfa with my mom, and can we just appreciate the fact that in the starting, everyone had to talk to Chris Evans's chest because he was supposed to be shorter.

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