therapy

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We sat on top of her house's roof and watched how the hummingbirds zipped right past our very own eyes; we watched the clouds race another to see who can reveal the sun's true colors. We watched everything turn into a hurry as the stars started to yawn. Time became a rare thing that no one seemed to have.

"You know, I'm starting to learn to love myself. But..." She whispered.

"But what?"

"But there are days where I wake up and think: maybe, just maybe, today is the day where I won't be judged and I won't start back at zero. And then I see them watching me, analyzing every step I take, how I take it if I do take it. Their judgments spills out of their mouths and lands right in front of me. And bam, back at zero. It's as if how I look and act impacts their lives on a greater scale than it does to mine, the person who is in the body. The person who is the body."

"Two words, love. Screw. Them." I sat up abruptly, feeling the anger purse through my veins. She chuckled lightly and ran a hand through her jungle of hair. "Seriously, they are toxic human beings who let their frustrations out on amazing and beautiful people. You. You're amazing and beautiful. Why do you think they are so quick to judge you? Because, they, themselves, are filled up to the brim, and some even spilling past the brim."

"Filled up with what?"

"Confusion. Fear. They don't know any better; they've seen their families taunt them and that's the only way they know. It's not an excuse they can use, of course. It's just that I've been there. When I was young, I was told to watch out after this type of group of people and to stay away from that type. It's all stereotypes and constant strands of a less-open-minded past haunting the present. When you grow up and see all of the awful things people have done to that type of person, then you know it's completely wrong. So, just let them be. Let your absence mark a greater knowledge.

Right now, focus on you. Focus on when you genuinely smile, your one and only dimple shows up on your cheek. Or how the sides of your eyes crease up a tiny bit. Focus on how when you're about to join in a debate, you analyze every one of your opponents before you speak and rip all their arguments apart. And when you finish, you don't show that you know you won; you're respectful and humble—even though we all know you've won. Focus on how great of a leader you are. Every single project at school, everyone wants to be your partner. They know because of you, they will learn something new. Focus on how fast you can type in a minute. Almost a hundred words per minute? That's amazing. I'm lucky if I can get to forty. Learn to love yourself before you let anyone love you."