After

Chapter 68.

After class I say goodbye to Landon and walk straight to the professor to explain my absences. He congratulates me on my internship and explains that he moved the syllabus around a little. I try to keep our conversation going until Hardin exits the room.

I make my way back to my dorm and sit out all my notes and textbooks on my bed. I try to study but I am edge waiting for Steph, Hardin or one of the many other people who are always in and out of my room, to show up. I pack my study materials into my bag and head to my car. I will find a place to study off campus, maybe a coffee shop. I drive towards town and see a small library on the corner of a busy street, there are only a few cars in the lot so I pull in. I walk all the way to the back of the library and sit next to the window, I pull all of my books and notes out and get to work. For the first time, I can study in peace, no distractions. This will be my new sanctuary, the perfect place to study.

"Miss, we are closing in five minutes." The elderly librarian informs me. Closing? I look out the window and it is dark out, I didn't even notice the sun going down. I will definelty have to come here more often.  

"Okay, thank you." I reply and pack up my things. I have one new text from Zed.

*I just wanted to tell you goodnight, I can't wait for Friday.*

*That is very sweet, thank you. I am looking forward to it as well.* I reply.

Steph isn't in the room when I get back so I change into my pajamas and grab Wuthering Heights. I fall asleep quickly, dreaming of Heathcliff and the moors.

Thursday goes smoothly and Hardin ignores me during class and I do the same. I spend my evening at the library until it closes again and go to bed early, preparing for the bonfire Friday. I am really looking forward to meeting Landon's girlfriend tonight, and seeing Karen and Ken, I have grown quite fond of them.  When I wake up on Friday I have a text message from Landon telling me that he won't be on campus at all today because Dakota will be arriving earlier than he thought. Skipping literature crosses my mind momentarily but I decide against it, I can't let Hardin ruin anything else.

I take a little more time to get ready today and braid the front of my hair back before curling it. The weather is supposed to be warm today so I wear a purple sleeveless fleece jacket and jeans. I still go to the coffee house before class, Logan is in front of me in line. Before I can walk away unnoticed, he turns around.

"Hey Tessa." he smiles.

"How are you?" I ask politely.

"I'm good, you coming tonight?"

"To the bonfire?" I ask.

"No, the party. The bonfire is going to be lame, it always is."

"Oh, I am going to the bonfire." I laugh lightly and he chuckles.

"Well if you're bored at the bonfire you can always come to the party." he offers and grabs his coffee.

I thank him as he walks away. I am relieved that Hardin's group of friends seem to be uninterested in the bonfire which means I won't have to deal with any of them tonight.  When it is time for Literature I walk right to my seat without a single glance in Hardin's direction. The discussion continues on Wuthering Heights but thankfully Hardin stays silent. I wish this ever present ache in my chest would go away, instead of shrinking it seems to get larger every moment of every day. I shouldn't have admitted to myself that I love him, if I would have kept ignoring the truth, maybe it would hurt less. As soon as we are dismissed, I gather my things and practically bolt to the door.

"Tessa!" I hear him call behind me but I just walk faster. Without Landon here I feel more vulnerable. I feel a light touch on my arm. I know it is him from the way my skin tingles.