[35]: serrated edge

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Lori stood straight from crouching over the table and smiled at me before making her way to the front door. I took much slower steps, being more cautious about the amount of doorways the place had. My hypervigilance coming out of me.

The sun hit my eyes as she opened the door, and I squinted to see where I was going.

I ended up walking into the doorframe but managed to recover.

She descended the front steps, passing a figure who was sitting there. Twisting his hat in his hands. He had one foot propped up higher than the other, and my image of him being a cowboy came back to me.

When Carl used to tell me about him, I always imagined John Wayne or Jeffrey Hunter.

Lori patted her husband's shoulder, and he reached up to her hand, then let her go just as fast as he grabbed it.

He hadn't noticed me behind him, I stood behind him awkwardly with my hands pressed together. I walked further towards the stairs, and he looked over his shoulder.

The man released a breath, looked back to the view in front of him.

I decided to sit next to him, as I had nothing better to do. My ribs sparked with pain, and I jerked sideways briefly, but I managed to get all the way down.

As I sat on his right, he looked towards me and I looked towards him.

"Has anyone asked you if you're okay?" he said quietly.

I paused for a moment, thinking about if anyone had actually asked me if I was okay.

The most popular question was "What happened" or anything along those lines.

"Not... really," I finally answered, looking down to my scarred palms.

"Are you okay?" he smiled.

I couldn't help but mirror his expression, but it fell, and I wanted to run away from everything.

I wanted to sprint and run out of breath. Find a river or a pond, and lay there until winter came. I wanted to be so cold.

I wanted to be the kind of cold where you couldn't feel the ends of your fingers, where it creates a numbness in your chest, and your skin tingled with a warm but freezing feeling.

I wanted the ice to cover my skin, creating a shell I needed.

I wanted my eyes to freeze up so that I wouldn't have to see... So I wouldn't have to look at anything, anymore.

Not anyone.

Not myself.

Not my arms, or my stomach, or my face, or my hands. Not anything. Not seeing anyone get lost or eaten or taken away from me, or the ones I would take.

I would give it up. Even give up the chance to see things like Carl, or the deer, or even the chance to see my brother again no matter how much he hated me.

"Marley?" I was pulled from my thoughts by Rick's grisly voice. "Are you okay?" all amusement in his voice had faded and was replaced by full concern.

I bit the insides if my cheeks. I thought I had said everything I just thought. Turned out hadn't.

"I'm fine," I lied flawlessly, placing a fake smile on my lips.

He looked unconvinced for a split second before his attention was switched to something over my shoulder. His eyes averted from mine and he spotted something.

He stood from his seat, tossing his hat onto my lap, which I somehow caught. I followed his gaze and found who he was looking at.

"Daryl," Rick yelled to the man.

𝐇𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐑𝐃 │ 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐘𝐋 𝐃𝐈𝐗𝐎𝐍 ¹ [✔]Where stories live. Discover now