Never Had ~ A Louis Tomlinson Love Story

Chapter 6: What I Know

(EMMA'S POV)

Life has been freaking great. Connor and I are officially a couple and have been for about three weeks now. Eleanor left a few days ago so I no longer have to deal with her. And best of all, I feel nothing for Louis anymore. He's just not a part of my life anymore, and I'm fine with that.

Okay so maybe I'm not fine with that. My life is good, but I imagine that it would be better if I had my best friend again. Of course he is only across the street and I see him pretty much every day. But I can't help but scowl every time I find myself looking at him from my living room window. One second all the old memories from when we were kids come back. Another second it's him yelling at me. If you think that's confusing, try having it float around your head twenty-four-seven. I'm just worried that things won't ever be the same.

My mum is still on her business trip. See, she's a professor and she was offered a summer course at Paris Sorbonne University and would not be back for another week. Luckily, this was the one thing she was comfortable doing: leaving me home alone. I don't know why, maybe because I don't have a car to drive around or I just have no social life. I'm glad she trusts me in some sort way, though. Especially now that I have a boyfriend. And a pretty nice one at that.

Connor is a great boyfriend. He's kind, sweet, and funny. It's nice to have someone around that can make me laugh when I need to, which is a lot given how sad I can be. I haven't had a boyfriend since I was sixteen. He broke up with me once my dad started to get bad and the whole town found out. That is the first reason I hate my dad, but there are many more. But off of that subject, Connor has taken me out on three dates so far and each one has been different. I just don't get how a guy can be so perfect. Of course, there is an exception to that. But I'm afraid that I've recently found his imperfection.

I know this makes me sound like a stalker, but sometimes I watch Louis when he comes and sits on the front porch of his house. He's been doing it for two days now: just sitting there, staring out into space. Something looks wrong, but I don't know what it could be. No way he is feeling bad about yelling at me. I would have known that. He probably would've apoligized by now, too. Something different was going on. Something I had never seen Louis experience. It was a mixture of confusion and sadness. Don't ask me what that is. I'm a biochemist not a psychologist. Plus, I'm too afraid to go over and ask.

Anyways, I invited Connor over to watch a movie tonight. He works down at the sporting goods store when he's not studying at the University of London. That's another great thing about Connor, he's a biochemisty major, just like me. It's great getting to talk to him about all the stuff I love because I know he likes it too. Louis and I had that with some things, but never with science or music. We had two different lives planned out for us. No matter what anyone else wanted, Louis and I wouldn't work out. And obviously, we didn't. But Connor, I can see myself with Connor. I guess I've finally found someone for me.

Problem is: I'm still not satisfied. There is still something missing. Connor isn't enough.

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(LOUIS' POV)

Come on Louis, you need to do this. You're nothing without her. And with Eleanor gone, you need her even more.

Yes, I am talking to myself. Standing in front of the front door, grasping the handle, debating on whether to go talk to Emma or not. The guilt has been eating me alive. I feel like if I don't go over there, I'll die. I just really need my best friend back.

I take a breath and open the door, stepping outside and walking along the edge of the driveway of my house and to the concrete street. The warm, bright lights of her house are on and I feel as if it is calling my name. My feet feel frozen, but I pick them up and scurry across the street before a car comes by. No going back now. Before I know it, I'm standing in front of her door. I cautiously put my hand up to the door, ready to knock, but pause when I hear a voice inside: a male's. I assume this is Connor. I press my ear closer to the door, but back up when his voice turns into a yell.

"I can't believe you made me loose my job! Now how do you think I'll be able to pay for school?" he shouted angerly. "I-I didn't mean to, Connor. I'm sorry. I'll help you find another job," her soft voice sounded scared. Now I was worried. I knew there was something up about this Connor guy: he's insane. "You'll help? You'd better help! Thanks to you I might have to get a job working fifty kilometers away or something! Shit, if I did that think of all the trouble you would be getting into! Flirting with that Tomlinson boy, that better not happen." he threatened her. Flirting? Last time I checked she was yelling at me. Pretty sure that isn't flirting, Connor. "Okay." she simply said, her voice slightly cracking as if she was going to cry. "Just shut up, okay? I've had a shitty day and I don't need you to mess it up anymore than you already have." At that, I snapped. I punched the door and let out what seemed to be an angry growl. "What the hell was that?" Connor yelled, loud footsteps following. Oh no, he heard that. Stupid Louis. I sprinted off the porch and hid behind one of the bushes on the side of the house. Seconds after I hid, Emma's door swung open and Connor came out. "If anyone heard that, I swear to God Emma.." He didn't finish his sentence, thank God. If he did, I might have gotten up and punched him right then and there. His fists were balled up and he had a scowl on his face as he searched the yard. My heartbeat was so loud I thought he might be able to hear it. Emma came out behind him and looked out towards my house. Her face looked red and puffy, like she was crying. Her arms were crossed, like she always did when she got nervous. She breathed heavily, most likely worried of what Connor might do next.

Not finding anything, Connor headed back in the house. Emma did not follow. I continued to watch as Connor came back out with a jacket and some car keys in hand. He hugged Emma and kissed her forehead. Wow, looks like he's having a bit of a mood swing problem. It's just weird watching this. And Emma isn't even fighting him. Where is the girl I've known all my life? If she was thinking, which she must not be, she would have broken up with him by now! What has gotten into her?

Connor drove off and she slowly walked back into the house, locking the door. When I was sure no one could see me, I stood up from behind the shrubbery and walked back across the street. Of course I wanted to go back and make sure Emma was okay. But I couldn't let her know that I was eavesdropping. Seeing her so scared and sad didn't change anything; she'd still hate me.

Well that plan backfired at bit. But now I know what is really going on. I'm her best friend and I can't let her do this to herself. Emma is too good for Connor. Hell, she's too good for anyone. I don't think she realizes how perfect she really is, or how stupid the male population of the world is.

I need to protect her, because she's obviously still hurting, even after six years. 

(A/N: Sorry this was short, I have writer's block tonight! Plus, this was somewhat of a filler. I'll have another chapter up tomorrow to make up for this one!! Hope you all are enjoying the story! I've been busy lately with school and soccer so my writing has been really slow. Sorry about that. I have the story planned out, I just need time to write it out. Please don't hate me! Instead, leave comments and vote! I love critism (good and bad!). Also, did you guys hear about the stadium tour? I'm so excited! It'll be great next summer! I'm also going to a show this summer in Oakland, California. Only about 70 days away and I'm freaking out!!! Plus school is almost out, meaning more time to write! Yay! Hope this update made things a little clearer for you all! xox -Katie)