Twenty Six

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"Do you want me to go in with you?" Sam asks as he parks in Jack's driveway.

"I think I can handle this." I reply, unsure.

"If anything goes wrong, just call me." He says.

I purse my lips and nod my head, "thank you, Sam."

I lean over the center console and give him a quick hug before getting out of the car. I brace myself as I was up to the front door by taking deep breaths. I hope nothing goes wrong. This day couldn't possibly get worse than it already is.

I try to open the door, but it's locked. Great. That just made it ten times harder to face him. I ring the doorbell and patiently wait for it to open. Not sure if he'll open it if he knows it me.

The door swings open and I come face to face with Jack. His eyebrows lower as he sees me.

"Oh, it's just you." He thins his lips. "Can I help you?"

"I want to talk." I quietly say.

"About what?"

"Us." I truthfully say. "I'm sorry for pressuring you into telling me. You said you couldn't before and I should've just left it at that."

I look around to see if anyone else is here besides Jack and he looks at me completely baffled and confused. I swear I'm not a lunatic.

"What are you looking for?" He asks me, his eyebrows strongly pulled together.

I bite my bottom lip, "I wanted to see if you had another girl here." I shrug.

"I'm not the same guy I was a year ago. I may seem like it, but I'm not. I don't have a rebound that I'll call every time we get into an argument. I've devoted everything to you." He emphasizes.

"I'm sorry, again." I sigh, stepping closer to him.

He doesn't step back, which surprises me.

"Is that all you need?" He asks me and my heart drops.

"You're not letting me go, are you?"

He runs a hand over his face, "to be honest, I don't know. I don't know what to do with myself or with you. It might be better for us to be apart?"

I shake my head, "don't do this, Jack." I breathe as my eyes become glassy. "You can't want to propose to me and then break up with me the same day."

He gives me a sad, apologetic smile and I see his eyes turn watery as well. I've never seen Jack this emotional and on the brink of tears. He grabs both of my hands in his.

"I love you so damn much, maybe one day we can actually get married. Maybe it's too soon right now." He softly tells me.

"It's not too soon. I want to be with you and you want to be with me."

My voice is on the edge and I'm about to fall over and cry. This can't all be happening right now.

"I talked to your dad... He told me to take care of you and maybe I'm saving you from a bigger heartbreak in the future?" Jack searches my eyes for some type of emotion besides sadness.

Does he want me to be grateful and thankful?

"You talked to my dad?" I bite my top lip. "What does that mean then if he told you to take care of me?"

"I have his blessing, but what good does that do anymore?"

"Jack, stop." I whine. "This isn't funny."

"It's not supposed to be. You have no idea how hard this is for me." He tells me. "I had everything planned out."

"I know, I heard your phone call with Johnson." I say.

His face softens, "you did?"

I recite the phone call in my mind for the second time today. Jack still hasn't fully let me inside of his house yet and I'm battling between the air conditioning and the heat from outside.

"Yeah, you want to call me your wife, you want a little family of our own." I give him a weak smile. "I never realized how much you think about me like that."

"I do all of the time. I want to make you happy." He squeezes my hands.

"You do make me happy. There's no reason for us to be breaking up."

"Just a little break. I need more time to thoroughly think things through." He breathes.

"Oh my god, Jack." I shake my head. "What more is there to think about? If you don't want us to get married anymore, that's fine, but I don't want to be without you."

"I don't like these pathetic little labels like girlfriend and boyfriend, Camila. They sound so childish!" Jack says. "I want to move beyond that. We haven't been together long, but I think we've been through so much to move up a level."

"I want to move up a level, too." I bite the inside of my cheek, a tear slipping out of my eye as I blink.

"I said I didn't want a kid, but the longer I'm with you, the more I want one with you. Maybe a boy who I can be a good role model for and teach him to do things or a little baby girl who I can spoil and call princess." He smiles fondly more to himself.

That's a lot to take in. A baby? I'm still a baby myself. I can't imagine Jack ever being a dad.

"But I'm only nineteen." I tell him.

"I know, that's the thing. It might be a little too much for you to handle at this age. That's why I was saying when you finish college so you wouldn't be so stressed out. If you don't want that, that's okay too. I'm not going to run off into the sunset with another girl and get her pregnant."

"I liked the idea of your general plan." I say. "Why can't we just stick to dating for a little longer?"

"What's the point of that? We want to be with each other. Might as well make it for good."

"I don't want to be judged for being married at the age of nineteen." I spit out.

My eyes widen as I realized how bad that actually sounded. That's not what I meant and it sounded completely flipped.

"Do I embarrass you?" Jack narrows his eyes at me and let's go of my hands.

"No, that's not what I'm saying-"

"Your friends are a little older than you and they got married? They don't give two fucks about what people think. If anything, they'd be ecstatic."

He's right. I'm being silly about this whole thing. Chase and Angelina didn't care what people said, but then again, they've been together linger than Jack and I have been.

"I'll give you time." Jack sighs, his hand going to the doorknob. "You need it more than I do. This wasn't exactly how I was expecting today to turn out, but think about it."

I open my mouth to speak again, but he's already shutting the door. I step back outside and let all of my tears fall. I probably look like a maniac right now, but all hope is literally lost.

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