The Impulsive Soul-Mates

Chapter 23 - Impossible Redemption's

Manik sat alone thinking what had been happening in his life recently. The images flashed before his eyes. Our accidental introduction, the insane idea, me coming over to Mumbai, our first kiss, the Mumbai darshan, our loving making, the lies, the fights and his baby, everything felt like a dream. A lone tear escaped his eye as he realized he was lying on the same bed as he was with me and our baby this morning. This could have been so much different only if certain things had not turned out the way they did. A tinge of pain choked his heart as he realized he was all alone and had lost every thing. He closed his eyes and shoved his face on the pillow which I used to sleep may be to derive my fragrance out of it.

"Get rid of IT".

Suddenly something struck Manik and he leapt up on the bed. The phrase haunted him and he tried to find the source. He stressed his brain to explore vague images of last night and it came again.

"Get rid of IT"

"Hazily he remembered how he landed at my door and I helped him back. We were on the same bed and his accusations on me and finally his verdict.

"Get rid of IT"

As it sunk in him slowly that he had said to get rid of our baby his breath choked in his throat. He palmed his mouth to hold on to himself. He scratched his nails on his head and let out a loud cry. He cursed himself for uttering those words.

What have I have done?. I killed my baby. It was not Nandini. It was me. It was me. I couldn't even cherish the moment of being a father before that I lost my baby. Nandini will never forgive me. I destroyed the most beautiful thing between us. I have lost her trust and our baby forever. My words rung in his ears, "I am free from you..its over between us ..Forever."

Manik got up and walked with a heavy heart. It was as if someone had put tons of weight on his chest and he couldn't breathe. He gathered all his courage and came and stood in front of his mother's door. He wanted me to just come and hug him straight. But I was not a mind reader he realized and finally moved his hand to ring the door bell. Not so surprisingly his mother opened it.

For the first time he couldn't meet her eyes, "Can I see Nandini", he said in a pitch that was hardly audible.

His mother moved aside and let him in. He came in and waited for her to say something.

"Wo yahan nahi hai", she replied bluntly.

"Matlab"

"Matlab..she left..aaj jab wo office se aayi toh bahut disturbed thi, usne jane k liye apna mann bana liya tha..isiliye maine use nahi roka", she said it straight on his face without any remorse.

His mother's words hit him like a cannon ball. For a moment he couldn't believe I was gone, gone forever. He was the one who wanted me to leave him alone and when I did he just couldn't digest it. I had actually left him and he could never see me again. He wanted to let out his pain of losing the two most important beings in his life in one single day and the best way to convey his pain according to him was his anger.

"Haan aap kyun rokogi use..apko meri life mein koi khushi jo bardarsht nahi hai..aap toh yehi chahti thi na ke hum alag ho jayen isiliye toh aapne usse apne saath rehne diya tha", Manik charged at her angrily.

"Toh mujhe kya karna chahiye tha Manik??, tumhari tarah mujhe bhi usse ghar se nikal dena chahiye tha..do you have any idea how broken she was??, tumhaari baatein tumhare taunts..you knew so well how to hurt her..the days that she spent here she would just cry silently..tumhe pata hai jab maine pehle usse apne saath rehne ko kaha tha, she declined stating that it would hurt you..yes after everything you did to her she still cared that you would be hurt..but tumhe toh koi fark nahi padta you don't need her right", she reminded Manik of his own words.