The Cellar

The Cellar (27) Epilogue

Chapter 27 (Epilogue)

Summer’s POV

I knelt down and laid the daisies on Louise’s grave, Becca did the same for Rose, laying down a large bunch of red roses; she would have wanted roses still. I missed both of them so much it made me feel sick, every morning I still expect them to be there, it takes a couple seconds to realise that I was finally home. I had a lot of guilt that I couldn’t help Rose but I think she’d been down there too long, she just couldn’t adjust to normal life, not that she even tried, a part of me believes that she didn’t want to live without him which makes me feel sick.

We talked to them for a while before Becca said she had to get home, it was her Mum’s birthday and they were having a party. I was so happy that she’d made up with her family; she didn’t ever think she would. “Bye Louise, bye Rose,” I whispered as we left. I always felt guilty leaving them but at least they’re next to each other. We couldn’t find their families and no one came forward so me and Becca arranged their funerals.

“So we’re meeting up next week for lunch right?” Becca asked, linking her arm in mine.

“Yep, and then shopping at the weekend.” Lewis and Becca’s brother would be coming with us. Her brother was really protective of her and they’d become close again, they were best friends growing up so I was happy for her that she’s got that back.

I said bye to Becca and walked to Lewis’ car, he was waiting for me in the car park as usual. Over the last two months I don’t think he’d let me out of his sight once, not that I wanted him to. He jumped out of the car when he saw me walking over. “You okay?” he asked, stopping just in front of me. He still seemed a little nervous around me, like he was scared of breaking me or something. Things were getting better but we were taking it slowly, I still had a lot of stuff to work through.

“I’m fine. I just want to go home and relax,” I said, chewing my lip. He looked like he wanted to kiss me but was holding back. We hadn’t gone any further than just kissing; I loved Lewis more than anything but after Clover I wasn’t ready to have sex again. I felt different now, dirty and used, not good enough for Lewis. I stepped forward and kissed him on the lips; he kissed me back and wrapped his arms around me.

“I love you,” he whispered, pressing his forehead against mine and stroking my cheek.

I smiled happily; I’d missed him saying those words for eight months. “I love you too.” We drove back to my house in silence, as soon as I opened the front door my parents ran into the room, visibly relaxing as they saw it was me. I can’t blame them for worrying though.

Lewis followed me up to my room and we laid down on my bed, looking up at the ceiling. It still feels strange to be here sometimes and I often find myself wondering around not knowing what to do or I’ll stay in my room for ages and read before I realise that I can go out. Lewis hates when I do that, he never says anything but I can see it in his eyes, I really can’t help it though. I rolled over and laid my head on Lewis’ chest, he started running his fingers through my hair comfortingly and I quickly fell asleep.

I woke up alone which was strange, he’s usually there. I got up to go and find him, picking up a jacket that was lying on the floor and opening the wardrobe to put it away. Someone grabbed the jacket out of my hand; I turned to see Lewis throwing it back on the chair. “You don’t have to keep everything crazy clean,” he said softly although I could tell he was angry, he got that look in his eye that he gets every time I talk about Clover and what happened.

“Sorry,” I said, looking at the floor.

He sighed and wrapped his arms around me, resting his chin on the top of my head. “Don’t apologise. I’m the one that should be sorry. I guess I’m just not used to tidy Summer!” he said jokingly, his body was too tense and I could tell he was just trying to lighten the mood and make me feel better. Lewis pulled back, “Your Mum’s calling you.” Calling me? I turned to the door and heard her shouting ‘Summer’ up the stairs. I didn’t dare look at Lewis. I know it hurt him when I didn’t answer, it just takes me a while to realise they’re calling me; I keep expecting to be called Lily.