Insecure - Tom Hiddleston Imagines Geared Towards Battling Insecurities

"Burdensome"

     The throbbing aches of a headache wake you from sleep, taking you out of one nightmare and pulling you into another. For a second, you had almost forgotten everything; for just a moment, you had thought you'd made it, that it was just a distant memory rather than a cruel reality.
     But you had been so terribly wrong.
     With a groan, you slowly sit yourself up, propping yourself against the back of the bed. Where were you again? What day was it? Each day rolled into the next. That's what being unemployed does, all motivation for keeping track lost. After the company laid you off, it went bankrupted, squashing the possibility of returning to your post. It had already been hard enough to obtain that job in the first place; with your extreme nervousness for interviews, you froze and stuttered no matter how hard you prepared. It was a curse that had continued to haunt you for two years.
     And at first, your parents had been supportive, letting you move back home and have a home-cooked meal as opposed to living in a shelter and rationing what was on the dollar menu. But with each passing week, each month that flew past, it was obvious that their patience was wearing thin. You didn't need to hear their late night chats or eavesdrop their phone calls to know that you, their "good-for-nothing, lazy-behind daughter," needed to "learn how to woman up and leave the nest because [they] can't provide for [you] forever."
     You had tried. But you were already feeling like a burden, and if loaning money and having shelter from your parents was causing strife, just imagine turning others. If your own family couldn't stand it, then who knows what your friends would say or do? You didn't want to impede or step on others toes anymore.
     So you decided you weren't.
     You had set your clock. Five o'clock in the morning, that's when you were going to do it: five, because most everyone loves that number and because if you weren't going to go through with this, you at least wanted to see the sun rise one more time, as if finding hope in the darkness and literally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.
     For a week you planned this. The cliffs were right by your house, only a twenty minute drive, and thank goodness they faced the east. You had even helped your dad fix up your old car, so it wouldn't be a bother to use one of your parents' vehicles. And you had even drafted the note and had been careful to write the first version on a napkin so no one would see until it was finalized on regular paper.
     And that had been your mistake.
     It was four minutes until five, and already the dawn was peeking over the ocean. For ten minutes now, you had been taking deep, cleansing breaths, the salty air saturating your lungs. All you could think about was how easier and simpler life will be. Your parents would have more food for themselves, spend less money on heating the house for one more person, now an extra car, and even life insurance money to help with the loss you had cost them. Your friends didn't have to check up on you or worry about why you were dodging their calls, having been too embarrassed to admit to them what happened.
     What you didn't expect was hearing a car pulling up onto the grass and feeling headlights shining on your back. You didn't expect to hear Tom shouting your name and running to pull you away from the edge. You didn't expect to feel hot tears trickle from your forehead to the base of your neck, the source of them being from Tom's own eyes from his head being against yours.
     "Please, don't do this."
     "How did you--"
     "I came to see why you've been so distant. Saw your napkin in the trash when I was talking with your dad. He called me while I was driving and said you had left a note on your bed."
He pulls away out the hug only so he can holds your cheeks and look into your eyes, the tips of your noses just barely touching. "You're most certainly not a bother, and it's not your fault that life isn't going perfect. But that doesn't mean your life isn't worth living or worth fighting for. The sun doesn't go away forever, and I know you know that. Never lose hope because in time, it gets brighter and brighter. Your daybreak will come, I promise, but you need to be here to see it and feel its warmth."
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