Tony: Heeeeeeeeey, guys! I got new shooooes!
Natasha: What're thoooose
Tony: Hahahahahaha!
Thor: HUMANS, I FOUND A BIRD!
Clint: Thor's holding me upside down
Bruce: What...?
Tony: SCIENCE BROOO! Hey there!
Bruce: Steve? You there?
Steve: Hi Bruce, what is it?
Bruce: There's something wrong with them...
Steve: What do you mean?
Tony: WHAT DO YOU MEAAAAAN!
Steve: ...
Steve: Tony no.
Natasha: DON'T INSULT HIM
Clint: Tony's preetty
Steve: Bruce, I think I'm beginning to understand what you're talking about.
Thor: THEY'RE FRENCH BRAIDING MY HAIR
Natasha: IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL
Steve: And just like that, all pretenses of grammar are gone.
Steve: Rest in pieces, grammar. You will be missed.
Bruce: Are you guys drunk?
Clint: NO
Natasha: MAYBE
Tony: DUH
Thor: OBVIOUSLY
Steve: Yeesh.
Steve: What happened?
Natasha: WHEEEEE
Steve: That's not an answer, Natasha.
Natasha: BOOP
Bruce: Natasha, calm down.
Natasha: Okie dokie.
Steve: How come you calm down for HIM?
Natasha: Cause I LIKE him
Steve: Wow, thanks...
Natasha: No, I LIKE him
Steve: Oh... OH!
Bruce: Um... oh... uh...
Natasha: I LIKE you.
Bruce: Natasha, you're drunk.
Natasha: Like
Tony: Cute
Thor: HEEHEE
Bruce: Uh
Steve: You're blushing, Bruce.
Bruce: How did you even know that?
Steve: I'm standing right behind you.
Bruce: Oh jeez.
Bruce: Wait, why are we texting each other if you're standing right behind me?
Steve: I have no idea.
Steve: But we should probably help them.
Natasha: TWEEEET TWITTER TWEET CHIRP CAW CAAAAAAAW SCREEEEECH
Steve: They're out of control.
Bruce: How on Earth do we help them?
Steve: Go and help them out, and then get the security tapes of them being drunk
Bruce: What would that do?
Steve: YouTube.
Bruce: How do you even know about YouTube?
Steve: Even 90 year olds know about the YouTubes.
Bruce: YouTube.
Steve: Yes, that.
Natasha: I don't feel so good.
Steve: Bruce, you go help her.
Bruce: What?
Steve: .
Bruce: Oh.
Thor: HUEHUEHUE
Natasha: I REALLY don't feel good...
Bruce: Coming.
Natasha: Boop.
Steve: You are incredibly drunk.
Steve: Where's everybody else?
Thor: THE MORTALS ARE EITHER THROWING UP OR HAVE ATTEMPTED TO EAT THEIR PHONES
Natasha: It didn't taste good
Steve: Oh, I wonder why.
Natasha: Caw caw.
Thor: HUEHUEHUE
Steve: Ok, that's it.
Steve: Do you want more alcohol?
Thor: YES!
Steve: There's some invisible alcohol where you are, try to find it.
Steve: Just stay where you are, ok?
Thor: THANK YOU, MORTAL!
Steve: Good job, Thor. You go do that. And don't mess with the security camera. Let's play a game called "Pretend The Camera Isn't There".
Thor: OK!
-Thor has left the chat-
Bruce: I'm back.
Bruce: Steve what on Earth are you doing
Steve: Don't worry, I'll make sure they're ok. Is Natasha out of there?
Bruce: Yup, she's ok.
Steve: Good, the rest of them are staying where they are and searching for alcohol that isn't there until I can go get them. There's a camera there too that they're all pretending isn't there.
Bruce: How'd you get them to agree to that?
Steve: I told them to search for invisible alcohol, stay where they are, and pretend the camera isn't there.
Bruce: ...
Bruce: That works.
Steve: Yeah.
Bruce: We're horrible friends, you know that?
Steve: The worst.
Bruce: I should go and make sure that Natasha isn't shooting a wall again.
Steve: Don't let her be Sherlock.
Bruce: What?
Steve: Sherlock, the BBC TV show with Bennieboop Cucumbersnoot?
Bruce: How do YOU know about a TV show that I don't?
Steve: 1. Magic. 2. You are an uncultured ninny.
Bruce: Did you just call me an... uncultured ninny?
Steve: Yes.
Bruce: Ok.
Bruce: Goodbye.
Steve: Bye.
-Bruce has left the chat-
-Steve has left the chat-
Don't do this at home, kids
YOU ARE READING
Avengers Texts
FanfictionSteve the Frisbee Grandpa, Tony the Internet Troll, Mom Natasha, Caps Lock Army Thor, and much more Here is yet another Avengers Texts, so you can find out how completely irresponsible they all are in their spare time. (I wrote this so long ago an...
