Chapter Twenty-Four : You're A Twatwaffle

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Chapter Twenty-Four : You're A Twatwaffle

 The fact that I can sense another person's presence in my room would be considered useful. It would mean that even when I'm asleep, my super ninja powers will protect me. However, on a Saturday and at the unholy hour of seven in the morning it's more like a curse. Sleeping Beauty, consider yourself lucky. You get to take the longest nap on the planet. Imagine all that uninterrupted sleep and you don't even age! How is that even a curse?

Anyway as I start to become aware of someone creeping towards me, I'm reminded of a tacky horror film. If I weren't so lazy, I'd just get up and scream 'NOOOO'. There's an inner battle going on within me. Half, well more like about ninety-nine percent content to keep sleeping while the other measly one percent reminding me that Cole is probably here and might possibly witness me drooling on my pillow, wearing my extremely flattering SpongeBob pajamas.

Guess who won that showdown?

"Tessie."

I pull the covers tightly around myself so that my body is cocooned by them. My head's buried in the pillow and I try to block out his voice. I love the guy, of course I do and his voice is just divine but nothing and absolutely nothing sounds appealing to me at this hour.

"Come on, Shortcake. Don't make me bust out the big guns." He says in a sing song voice and I feel him plop down on the bed beside me. At this point, I more or less resemble a mummy what with being wrapped up in the sheets and all.

"Mmph." This is the only sound of protest I can stand to make. Too tired and too lazy to do more, coupled with what remains of my PMS has me struggling to gain coherency.

"I don't understand sleep obsessed Tessie, can I order the regular version please?"

"It's too early for me to make a wise crack." I mumble or at least that's what I hope I mumbled. From what my ears manage to pick up I sound like someone stuffed a boxing glove in my mouth. Coherence obviously isn't at its peak at the moment.

"Tessie, come on. I'll buy you donuts and even let you get the one with the disgusting frosting."

He's bribing me with donuts. That much I can process and so lured in by sugar coated goodness, I pop one eye open and then the other. Suddenly the world has clarity and I have a purpose to actually make it out of this bed.

Donuts

Once he's convinced that his method of bribery has worked her leaves me alone after a kiss to the top of my head but not before I have the last word.

Twatwaffle."
"What?"
"You're a twatwaffle."
"Is that supposed to be insulting Tessie?."
"It sounded a little bit more intimidating in my head.

 It definitely is the perfect start to my day. To say that I'm not nervous would be the kind of lie that would set an infinite amount of pants on fire. Cole's friends are ex-felons, well most of them anyway. Not that I'm judging them, it's me that I'm more concerned with. Beth would fit right into that kind of crowd. Cool as a cucumber, nonchalant and that rocker vibe ensures that she would be able to hang with the best of them. I'm a dorky blonde and the closest I've come to getting a tattoo is Photoshopping one onto my arm when I got bored in Computer class. What if they hate me? What if I make it all one big awkward disaster? Cole hasn't met them in the longest of times and I would hate to be the reason that he doesn't get the opportunity to the kind of quality time that he requires with them.

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